My People

My People
My matched set of grandchildren - Oliver and Cosette

Saturday, September 19, 2009

my bonus days

I'm really, very ok.
One year has passed.
A year ago today I gave up.
A year ago today my husband carried my unconscious body to the ER.
The medical professionals did what they had to do.
God spared my life.
The next day I woke up.
The day after that I was transferred to a psychiatric facility for the mandatory "Baker Act" hold that the state of Florida required to protect me from harm.
Three days later I was determined to be stable.
I left the hospital.
Two days later I left Jacksonville and my husband for good.
It hasn't been easy.
It hasn't been as hard as I had feared.
God has been faithful.
I have never gone hungry. I have never done without anything I needed.
God has kept my little car running.
He has given me a job.
He has stood in the gap for me every time my resources were running low.
He has blessed beyond measure.
I haven't always been faithful to God but HE has always been faithful to me.
Along the path I have made a lot of friends.
I have learned a lot about myself.
I have been embraced by a church and a community and my family.
I have lived a beautiful life.
I feel like these are the bonus days. These are the overtime points.
I know more about the heart of God than I ever could have before.
I know more about my own inner strength.
I have hope.
Whatever He has for me... I know that I can trust Him.
No matter how dark the future may look... life is always worth living.
I wish I was thinner. I wish I was healthier. I wish I had more money. I wish my husband had loved me. I wish there had been the kind of "happily ever after" I had dreamed of.
But I'm grateful... so very grateful... for the life God has given me.
A life that almost ended one year ago today.

8 comments:

stasha said...

Aunt Heather, I am soo very thankful that you are in my life!

Anonymous said...

Happy Anniversary! I seriously mean that. Julie

Anonymous said...

I am so very grateful, too. :)

mawmaw said...

I love you

LYN said...

HIND SIGHT IS 20/20...

Wendy in Oz said...

What a difference a year makes! I am very glad you are still around to blog about life and all its up and downs. Love and hugs from Down Under...xxx

moshell's lilbit of space said...

I am glad you are here too.

God is GREAT.

Estela said...

Here's to another year! Best Wishes, Estela