Join the Heathertarian Party

I'm going to "Occupy" my blog this morning... paint my cardboard posters (or, just type what I want to say) ... sit my ample backside down in my nest and refuse to move until my demands are met. Or. Until it's time to leave for work.

Here are my demands:

1. Get rid of the income tax. It was implemented by Prohibitionists so that the dependence on "sin taxes" on  "demon rum" and other spirits which provided about 70% of the nations budget would no longer be needed. When Prohibition was repealed, why wasn't the income tax? Use sales taxes to collect money on goods and services purchased in the United States which will mean that the more that people buy, the more they will pay in taxes.

2. Regulate the pharmaceutical industry. There is no reason why 30 pills should cost nearly $300. Once the New Year comes and my deductible resets at $2500, the only way I can afford health insurance, I'm going to have to make a choice between not having my meds that keep me functioning or not being able to pay rent/buy groceries, etc.

3. Tort reform. Limit the amount of money that medical professionals can be sued for. Our litigious society has contributed the high cost of health care. Doctors have to have insurance to protect them against lawsuit... therefore they have to charge high prices for the care they deliver.

4. Eliminate hospital mass billing or excessive billing - $10 for a tylenol, for example. You're already paying room and board, this should cover the cost of having a nurse bring you a tylenol... the tylenol should cost about ten cents.

5. Stop assuming that your right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness entitles you to welfare, food stamps, medicaid, government housing. Your right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness doesn't mean that I should give you what I earn because of your life choices. Implement drug testing for anyone receiving government assistance, including everyone in their household. Put able bodied welfare recipients to work doing things that government employees are being paid to do. Provide child care for those who go to work. People don't respect what they have until they have worked for it.

6. Term limits for politicians at all levels of government. We need people with vision and understanding of what it takes to be successful in the private sector. We need people who are able to vote their heart and mind and accurately reflect the wishes of their constituency without having to worry about re-election.

7. Legalize marijuana and tax the heck out of it. I have never (and will never) smoke it... but I think we're clogging our prisons and wasting valuable tax dollars on fighting this mild drug. There are drugs (such as meth or crack) that cause physical harm to the user and place others at risk. I look at people like Willie Nelson and think... he's so mild-mannered and chilled... let the old man have his pot.

8. Stop passing stupid "green" legislation that limits industry and places unfair burdens on American companies. If you want to keep American industry on Americal soil, quit regulating businesses to death.

9. Allow for drilling of American oil. Stop our dependence on foreign oil. We made our enemy rich by not utilizing our own natural resources.

10. Balanced budget means spending an amount less than or equal to your income. We can't afford to send money to people (like Pakistan) that hate us, see us as the enemy or infidels and want to eliminate us from the planet. We can't afford pork barrel spending. We can't afford pet projects that are implemented to benefit one small constituency so that a representative of that constituency will get re-elected.

11. Disband unions. The reason they were formed no longer exists... working conditions are fair and more highly legislated that in the past. Unions have become too powerful and falsely inflate the cost of goods and services. Or at least limit their impact.

I'm going to have to stop occupying here so that I can get ready to go to my occupation, work for the evil corporation (that provides financial stability to millions of people) drive my foreign car that was made better than the American made cars I've had in the past, fill it with gas derived from foreign oil that has made some Saudi rich, Later, I'll go visit my overpaid pain doctor who I'm sure will provide me with additional or new prescriptions so that I can continue to pump up the pharmaceutical industry, since my insurance doesn't cover holistic or natural treatments that would have been commonly available 100 years ago. Then I'll come home and hook up to the internet, watch satellite tv and eat food that I worked hard to pay for...

 One last thing... my uncle Bill posted this picture on his facebook yesterday and I copied it... but for those who missed it, I find this picture absolutely amazing. The baby on the far left is my Granddaddy Pennington, my mom's father - who I absolutely adored. He called me "Heiffer" and grew an awesome garden with strawberries and grapes and blackberries and figs... and lots of other things, I'm sure... but those were my favorites.

this picture was taken in Miller County, MO in 1910. From left to right: My grandfather, C.B. Pennington (1908-1978); his father, (my great-grandfather) William J. Pennington (1878-1962); his father, (my great-great-grandfather) John Pennington (1857-1946); and his father, (amazingly, my great-great-great grandfather) Samuel Pennington (1828-1914) Picture was probably taken at the time of Samuel's second marriage. His first wife was Martha Walls (1833-1904).

sunday morning ketchup

Ok... it's really a Sunday morning CATCH up... but I thought the other way was cute.
Since we last left this story...

Thursday night was my sleep study. I dreaded it. I can't even tell you how much I dreaded it. I even postponed it once. It involved staying up past my bedtime, driving the 45 minutes to the sleep study lab, finding a place I'd never been - and finding it in the dark - and I don't see well at night, even with my glasses. My Garmin is warped when it comes to that area, we've been through this before... for some reason Garmin wants me to go left off the exit but I know that the medical offices and the hospital are to the right. So once I make that right... I just keep hearing the "make the next legal u-turn" repeated, which makes me a nervous wreck. I ended up in a parking lot calling the sleep lab in a panic because I couldn't find it...

Anyways... besides trying to find the place in the dark... I know I don't sleep well away from home, I don't sleep well without a tv on, I need time to wind down before I can get to sleep and the whole commute to the sleep lab was so stressful that I was definitely not ready for bed. The sleep lab technician was bossy... she gave me so many instructions that I was even more stressed. She wanted me to sleep on my back... which, I can't even lay on my back without excruciating pain... she let me know what a huge pain it would be for me to get up during the night to go to the bathroom (which I do at least twice a night)... it was not restful. Every time I tried to respond to her questions in a hushed tone she couldn't hear me... and when I spoke up she hushed me.

So... of course... I didn't sleep well. They need six hours of sleep which I couldn't do (reminded me of those times when you have to give a urine sample and then you can't go)... she came into the room shortly before 4am and said, "I can tell that your brain has been awake for fifteen minutes... why didn't you buzz for me?" BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO GO BACK TO SLEEP... duh! Anyways... I knew then that I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep... so she said I could go if I signed a paper saying that I voluntarily ended the study  early. I mean.. if it's a sleep study and I can't sleep, why should I lay in some strange bed waiting for the clock to hit 6am? That's stupid. And there was another person there whose "appointment" was earlier than mine so she would have to process him out first... which took about 30 minutes to unhook all the wires.

SOOOooo... I left there before 5am... drove home in the dark... trying to keep a keen eye for deer in the road... and was nearly catatonic all day Friday... but I worked the whole day. I was sound asleep before 7pm Friday night and I slept until 6am Saturday.

When I got up Saturday I headed out to go grocery shopping. It was so beautiful with the early morning mist and the fall colors. We're not at peak color yet but there are plenty of trees that have started to turn. I was glad to be out and about before things got crowded or the tourist traffic picked up. I had a good grocery run...felt like I budgeted well and still got the things we needed to get through the week. It's sort of a conundrum because it's a huge inconvenience to go to the store during the work week but if I try to anticipate all the things we're going to need during the week, we end up having too much stuff and some of it spoils and gets wasted. I tried to plan meals that would have leftovers for my lunch - because it's too expensive to eat out for lunch every day and I really like my car picnics now that the weather is pleasant.

Austin and I spent the day organizing his room (mostly him), watching football (all me) and just hanging out at our nest. He got motivated to get organized ... and I'm relieved. I thought he would always be a disgusting hoarder... and there is no way to nag/cajole/plead/punish that out of someone. For him to say, "I'm tired of living in this mess"... that's HUGE progress. I am having a lot of joint pain, especially in my hands, but when he asked if I would fold his clothes for him so they could go neatly into the allotted spot, I was more than happy to help. We've decided that the best way to keep his room clean is to keep his clothes somewhere other than his room... he has such a tendency to get the clean and dirty clothes mixed up and to dump out neatly folded clothes on the floor when he's searching for something. We decided to keep his clean clothes under his bathroom sink - there's a good bit of space - and to keep his dirty clothes in a hamper in his bathroom. His bathroom adjoins mine - he has a half bath and I have the full bath - so he can shower, go into his bathroom to get dressed and since the shower is in my bathroom, his bathroom doesn't get steamy and damp like mine does.

I made beef tips and gravy in the crockpot for our dinner. I "invented" my own recipe for the beef tips when I found the thin little steaks on sale at the grocery store yesterday. I mixed about a cup of red wine with a big  can of cream of mushroom soup, a packet of beefy onion dried soup mix and a cup of water. I cooked the steaks all day on low... made brown rice in the rice cooker... and it made a huge amount. We have enough leftovers for about two more meals for the two of us. And Austin loved it... which makes it even better. Today I'm doing dried beans in the crockpot with a little piece of ham I bought for super cheap. That will make a couple of meals worth of leftovers too. I found these individual cheese slices with specialty cheeses - hickory swiss and extra sharp cheddar (Austin's favorites - well, he likes smoked gouda and extra sharp cheddar) so we can have grilled cheese and soup a couple of times. He loves tomato soup (I detest it) and it was on sale as well. Good eats ahead for this week.

I watched the movie "No Strings Attached" with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman. It was not as good as I thought it would be. It was one of the few movies that I was tempted to see at the theatre... and I'm glad I waited to see it for free. It was just... blah.

Other than that... it's been a quiet past few days... today I am finishing folding and putting away MY laundry, helping Austin finish organizing his room... and trying to get the inflammation in my joints calmed down. My hands ached so bad over night that I saw every hour on the clock (or the tv) so I may have a nap at some point... but I'm definitely going to concentrate on getting ready for the week ahead...

Hope you have a great Sunday! Love and hugs!

a window on the world of chronic pain

I've been recognizing some unhealthy character traits that I have developed (some of you are saying, "it's about time!") and I've been trying to tie them together in a neat little package to better understand myself. Maybe some of the things I'm dealing with affect some of you too. Tell me if you identify with any of these statements:

1. I embrace and befriend a number of people online but I have little interest in face to face time with them.
2. I love and deeply care for a number of family members but the thought of actually investing time and expending the energy to go to see them is overwhelming to me.
3. I hate talking on the phone. I will write volumes of emails but will avoid the phone at all costs. My phone was off for an entire weekend recently and I didn't even notice.
4. I support and appreciate the efforts of my local church but have little interest in attending or participating.
5. I am reluctant to entertain any thought whatsoever of romantic relationships because I assume the outcome will be the same regardless of what I do... I fear that I will be sucked in, become attached and then disappointed/rejected.
6. When people in real life ask how I'm doing, I avoid a lot of the details because I assume people are "over it" or don't really want to know. I feel like I can never hold anyone's attention long enough to fully explain. I will usually answer with a dismissive, "not good"... and leave it there without elaboration.
7. I fear becoming the person that people avoid because the news is always bad... I always have a complaint... I become Nancy Negative.
8. I filter a lot of emotions instead of sharing them or even really allowing myself to experience them. I feel like if the dam breaks... it will be too much for me - or anyone else - to bear.
9. I tend to judge or avoid people who are overly emotional or dramatic.
10. I'm rarely hungry. I eat because I know I have to but it is a chore. However... if I have something in the house that I really enjoy, I overindulge.
11. I assume that people don't have time for me.
12. I make no effort to contact my grown children because I feel like they need to live their own lives and don't need to be nagged to feel obligated to interact with me. I feel like they will come to me if they want my company. I don't want to intrude on their lives.
13. I avoid any situation that will potentially be painful. If I know that I have a potential painful activity that I have to participate in, I will make sure I have recovery time scheduled.
14. I consider myself "bad company"... more of a burden than a blessing to be around.
15. I find myself so distracted by pain that I frequently can't focus on anything else. It's given me a short attention span and taken away my sense of humor.
16. I avoid new situations. I am uncomfortable with any variation from my regular routine. I've learned to navigate and control my pain in known situations... the unknown could be painful.
17. I have so much pain during the workday that I am physically and emotionally drained by the time I leave each day.
18. I rarely feel lonely but think that I should.
19. I feel that I need to come with a disclaimer.
20. I know that my pain is invisible to most people. I sense that some feel it's not legitimate. I have no desire to prove anything to anyone. You can't ever really know what someone else is physically feeling.

This is the first time I've created this list where I could actually read it... but I've mulled over the individual points many times. I see this time as a season in my life... a time where I can learn to empathize with people who have chronic pain or who are isolated by their circumstances. I don't really feel sorry for myself, I feel guilty a lot of times that I can't be more or do more so I feel sorry for the people I disappoint.  I don't see this as a cross to bear so much as it is a window on a world I wouldn't otherwise see. I see it as an opportunity to learn to live and love in a different way. And I know that any time I am transparent and allow people to know my deepest feelings and thoughts that I find a lot of people who identify with me.

I am who I am. I have become who I have become. I am not bitter. I am not sad. I am just a girl who is dealing with a different set of circumstances than what I expected to deal with at this age. Or ever. Who can really mentally prepare yourself for being physically limited? I accept my limitations. I am prepared, as much as you can be, for what lies ahead. I see blessings in every day. I see disappointments every day. I find new reasons every day to "prove" that God is real. I am thankful for my shortcomings because it forces me to depend on Him. No matter how bad things are, I know that God is good. And things, honestly, are better than they have been in the past.

I don't really know how to wrap this entry up other than to say, if you see yourself in any of those points, I hope you'll tell me. If you've been there, done that and have a way to do things better, I'd like to hear your suggestions. Have a great Thursday y'all! Sleep study tonight... ugh!

whiny wednesday

Wednesday. *deep breath* It's Wednesday. Yesterday was such a crazy, demanding day that I feel like I should get credit for at least two days from it. It was a long day. Darby used to say that every day is the same length... *eyeroll*... and while that may be true in a literal sense, there are definitely days that require more out of you. It was one of those days at work where I felt like I was the only one who was handling/could handle a dozen different issues all at the same time. I can't go into specific explanations due to confidentiality issues... but suffice it to say... the work load wasn't balanced yesterday and I felt it from the pain in my brain to the muscle spasms in my back to the pain in my feet. I was nearly in tears... but I didn't have time to pee, much less cry.

Trouble's new perch: the kitchen window

And then I got home and Austin met me in the driveway with a pizza coupon wanting me to drive into town to get him a pizza. Mind you... he had not YET done the dishes that he was asked to do on Monday afternoon... but he wanted what he wanted right then. I gave him a piece of maternal advice, "make sure that before you ask for something special out of someone who has worked very hard, that you at least show the minimal amount of effort to do what they have asked you to do". Mercy. 

I had a bowl of soup for dinner. I don't know what he had ... there's plenty of food in the house. No pizza but... too bad. I was asleep not long after 8pm. Blissful, restorative sleep. 

I have the sleep study rescheduled for tomorrow night. I'm really not happy about doing it. I really don't WANT to do it. It's part of the standard work up for the fibromyalgia stuff and I totally resent the diagnosis and all that goes along with it. I'm told the correct way to consider it is "fibromyalgia syndrome" that includes several symptoms and disorders and that it's best to eliminate and/or treat as many of those as possible, even though there's not a true CURE for it. My deductible is paid for this year... it's best to take care of these kind of pricey tests when the financial impact on me will be the least but... geez. I can't even tell you how very much I don't want to do it. I don't sleep well away from home. I'm not scheduled to be at the test center until 9:30 and I'm usually asleep long before then... I don't like the idea of being out of my normal morning routine and the last thing I want to do is deal with a commute home before work on Friday... I'll be tired, grumpy and miserable on Friday at work... and chances are good, based on Murphy's Law, that I'll have another day like yesterday where I spend waaaay too much time trying to connect the dots, read between the lines, solve problems and deal with unhappy/demanding clients. 

Have I paid enough attention to Whiny Wednesday? I really want to get it all out of my system so I can have a good day. I left a half dozen things halfway done at work and need to go in all clear headed and focused. I've got to get the blues, despairs, agonies and miseries out of the way before then. When I get bogged down in busy work it's hard to put any cha-ching in my day. Frustrating. 

Ok... mood swing... we filled out the paperwork yesterday for Austin to qualify for Vocational Rehabilitation through the State. This is incredibly important for him... there are certain behaviors and attitudes that are expected of people in the work force and a lot of these things are not instinctive in people with autism. He's smart but he's not intuitive most of the time. This program will give him more of an even playing field for entering the work force. It will also provide funding for technical school and/or college classes that will help him become a contributing member of society. I am excited and relieved about this program... takes

I've been pretty outspoken about my disdain for government handouts. I believe there are good programs out there, programs that give a hand up not a hand out. From what I can tell, this is a hand up. Businesses are given tax incentives to employ people who will need a little extra training or understanding... the jobs already exist, it's just a matter of filling them with a person who would otherwise clog the welfare rolls. Creating temporary jobs that are dependent on government funds... bogging down jobs in more bureaucratic red tape than actual salaries to a real person... when we start looking at spending billions of dollars to create a handful of jobs... unsustainable employment... I don't understand how that makes sense to anyone. Empower people to earn a living. Reward businesses for creating jobs, don't penalize them with extra expenses, taxes, obligations that prevent them from hiring. Avoid passing legislation that eats away at profits for private businesses. I'm just a simple uneducated girl living paycheck to paycheck and it seems so simple.

I'll always go back to one of my fundamental, core perceptions: if you give a man a fish, he eats for a meal. If you teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. 

Another mild day on the calendar... perfect fall weather. I'm gonna get my head straight, get my glam routine started and get out there and earn a living. Love and hugs, y'all!

Newsday Tuesday

It's newsday Tuesday and I'm remarkably ambivalent today. I have a pain in my brain again... which ultimately could be described as a pain in the rear because if the penicillin shot didn't knock out the sinus pain and pressure and if the junk in my head moved deeper into my chest (which it has) I'm supposed to go back to the doctor for something stronger to make sure I don't get pneumonia, since I get pneumonia so easy. 


The thought of burning another hour or more sitting in that tiny exam room makes my head hurt even worse. The thought of missing more hours off the time clock to deal with something that should have been knocked out makes my head hurt even worse. 


Rebel Heather wants to put it off. 
Whiny Heather wants to take a week off to rest and get well. 
Broke Heather knows she can't afford to put it off OR take time off to get well. WHICH makes my head spin. 


Anyways... I'm glad Amanda Knox was released. I'm not one hundred percent sure she wasn't involved in the murder but I'm fairly certain it wasn't proven beyond a reasonable doubt. Justice is a tricky thing. 


I'm not sure I understand these folks protesting against Capitalism. Obviously, I'm no political science expert and admittedly am more likely to listen to Rush Limbaugh than Rachel Maddow... but what is it exactly they WANT? Socialism? Why are we hating on the rich and successful in society? They're the ones paying taxes and keeping this country afloat, such as it is. I heart rich people. Sure... I wish I made more money... sure... I experience a little bit of jealousy when I see people who so easily can travel and spend money and live a life where they don't have to put off paying a bill to buy their kid a new pair of shoes. I made choices and have to live with the consequences of those choices throughout life. The fact that someone else made better choices that gives them more disposable income doesn't mean that they owe me anything... the only people who owe me anything are my kids' dad and my employer. I don't want to turn to the government for my health care, room and board, food... I want to earn my own way in this world and I want to keep as much as possible from what I earn. 


Below is a great analogy about Capitalism vs. Socialism... I saw this several places and never saw it attributed to anyone in particular... AND then the traditional "two cow" analogy, which I've also seen a dozen places without being contributed to anyone. 


I'll leave you with these for today... and pray that you have an awesome Tuesday! 


As explained in a free market, Capitalism vs. Socialism by an economics professor at Texas Tech, Steve Latter. An economics professor at Texas Tech said he had never failed a single student before but had, once, failed an entire class. That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer. The professor then said ok, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would receive an A. After the first test the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. But, as the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too; so they studied little. The second test average was a D! No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around the average was an F. The scores never increased as bickering, blame, and name calling all resulted in hard feelings as no one would study any longer for the benefit of anyone else. All failed, to their great surprise, and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because under capitalism when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great; but when the government levels the playing field and takes more of reward away; no one will try or want to succeed as much as before. Could not be any simpler than that…. Free Market Capitalism vs. Socialism: A Simple Analogy

Politics explained with two cow analogy:

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons. (Original source unknown)

Reasons to Love Monday.

I have typed the opening sentence to this entry about a half dozen times. I want to start the week with positive energy and optimism. I just really feel icky and want to curl back up in bed and pull the covers over my head. The truth is, to some degree, the world mirrors back to you whatever attitude you're putting out... and if you start your day - if I start MY day/week with the attitude of "I don't want to be anywhere except my nest" then people aren't going to want to do business with me. It's a critical time for us... we have a lot of work to do as an agency and it's not going to happen if I'm posing as The Queen of Mean.

So... without any further introduction... here's this week's Reasons to Love Monday:

1. Amanda Knox may be released today. I don't believe she's guilty. What do you think?

2. It's 43 degrees here in Sautee Nacoochee... cool, crisp fall weather!

3. I'm wearing a new outfit today... well, new to me. With my cute boots.

4. I remembered to buy a new pair of tights so I won't have to dig through and find the pair with the least amount of holes and runs.

5. Today is payday! I can pay my rent and power bill and anything else that's mandatory between now and next payday. 

6. Last night Austin went to the viewing for a 12 year old boy in our community who died last week. His mama works for another local State Farm agency. No matter how much effort it takes me to drag myself in to work this morning, I could be dragging myself through the process of burying a child. 

7. We have staff meeting this morning so I have to be at work at 8. (And I'm not SURE that qualifies as a real reason to love Monday but it's what needs to be done so I'm going to do with with as much energy and enthusiasm as I can possibly come up with!)

8. I have a new "Favorite" color... it's sort of in between lavendar and plum... a rich purple but not the deepest darkest purple. I'm going to try to do a Pinterst page showing that color.

9. I did a thorough grocery shopping job this weekend so I have food for lunch and can spend my entire lunch break picnicking. 

10. I'm poor... so nobody is out protesting my wealth... ha!

Time to wake the boy... have a great Monday, y'all!

the view from The Nest

Exciting news from the Nest this weekend:

I put on green fuzzy socks.

Austin cooked polenta.

I went to the grocery store.

Austin worked for Sue, our landlord, cleaning out a vacated apartment.

I cuddled with Trouble, the cat formerly known as Lexilishus.

Austin got onto me for eating banana pudding.

I tried to adjust my dosage of savella, the medication for the fibromyalgia that makes me throw up.

Austin slept all afternoon yesterday.

I watched football all day.

The Gators lost to Alabama, which was expected.

Arkansas beat Texas A&M which was not expected.

South Carolina lost to Auburn, which was disappointing. I don't like Auburn.

I did a load of laundry.

I loaded the dishwasher.

Austin took out the trash. Or, neglected to take out the trash.

The weather has been cool/mild.

The leaves are just barely beginning to change... just a hint of red in a few places.

I wanted to shop for a Christmas tree to replace my pink one but decided to wait.

I had thai basil rolls for dinner Friday night.

Austin slept through dinner and woke up at 8pm and ate hot pockets.

We found out our neighbors allegedly left with some items that didn't belong to them, such as a laptop he was repairing.

We found out that they left most of their furniture and a huge mess in the apartment.

I realized on Friday that Barack Obama has used the alias Barry Soetero at some points in his life.

And described his religion as Islam.

I wonder... did we elect someone who truly does hate America? 

I don't know much about politics... and I'm not sure there's anyone in the race right now that is the total package.

But I hope in 2012 we elect someone who is a God fearing Patriot. 

That's all. 

I watched a fascinating documentary about abortion this morning on the Catholic channel.

It was, of course, pro-life, as am I. 

It was heartbreaking to hear some of the stories of botched abortions. 

I thought abortion was legalized to keep these kind of dirty, back alley, unsafe abortions from happening.

Yet... they still happen.

I truly grieve for the lives that have been lost, the lives that have been changed, the perspective that it's ok to end a life.

Sometimes I just don't understand the logic of this world.

But my Nest... ahhh... it's a beautiful, semi-clean, comfy, cozy, place... with fresh clean mountain air - chilly mountain air - blowing through the open windows. 

I'm glad I went ahead and got the penicillin shot on Wednesday. I do feel better. 

Sometimes it's hard to tell... I hurt a lot of the time. Most of the time. All of the time. So when I get sick and have discomfort in my body, like I did in my ears and head and throat... you can't help but think it's just part and parcel of the other pain... not necessarily infection.

This time it was infection.

Ivan, my cousin Rik's stepson, is recovering, to God be all the Glory. 

I didn't say this to his mother, Vanessa, but I did think it and pray it: she married a Pennington. And although we are an odd bunch, to some degree, there is a definite anointing on this family that carries forth through the generations. A strength that defies explanation. I believe that strength will carry Ivan back to good health. 

A lot of us pray. And I believe my grandparents watch over us.

Of course, I would say the same thing about my paternal lineage as well. 

I come from very strong, deeply faithful roots. I'm proud of that. I see that in my children. I see that in my cousins. I see it in my nieces and nephews... on both sides.

God is for us, I'm certain of it.

Are you still reading?

Hope you have had a wonderful weekend and are feeling as blessed as I am, here in my Nest.