My People

My People
My matched set of grandchildren - Oliver and Cosette

Monday, October 22, 2012

Reasons to Love Monday - Heading Home

Oh! What an awesome weekend! It has been mostly quiet and restful here at the Mountain house. Pop came up on Saturday to meet with an electrician to fix a few of the things that were not working *quite* right. There were a few lights that didn't work and a few switches that we couldn't identify. The power at the dock wasn't working (or so we thought, it works fine!) The power in the fountain is working. Lots of little things around here that just needed tweaking.

Grandma came along with Pop and she and I went into town to run a few errands... post office for her, bakery for me. She marveled at how friendly the people were, gentlemen holding doors for us, the postal worker being uber-patient even though we go there right at closing time... I told her that people are just nicer up here.

Grandma 

my Steel Magnolia

Pop and Grandma on the back deck
Austin has had his friend "Fat Pat" (who isn't fat at all) over to spend the night - and then back twice to go fishing, as Pat loves our little fishing hole. Austin has been bored, off and on, since we don't have tv here... but he lived for the past three months without tv so it's not like it's something he's unaccustomed to. So having Pat stop by has been good for Austin.

I've had a few aches and pains and haven't felt *great* but... that's so often the case for me... if you're gonna feel rotten anyways, might as well enjoy the view! I've had a nasty migraine off and on. I've got a place where a tooth broke about... oh... a month or so ago... and it's been anywhere from mildly irritating to "shoot me and put me out of my misery". So that hasn't been fun. It's no better or worse than it would have been back in Riverdale...

Austin still has a few issues - the ones I've battled his entire life but  I prefer him with us, safe and bratty to him being in a place where he has to wear dirty clothes (the only time his clothes were washed over the past 3 1/2 months was when I took a load to the laundry mat and paid them to wash for him.) doesn't get enough to eat... doesn't have transportation or any sort of role model in his life. It's been hard for me to know that he wasn't in what I would consider a safe environment but...dang... it's hard trying to raise an adult who doesn't always act like an adult. All of that has come flooding back this weekend and it has made dealing with things like migraines and toothaches a greater challenge. Of course, we're talking about a fraction of the time... for the most part it's been great to have company, great to have help lifting, toting, cooking, etc. It's still good to have him back. Continue to pray that he will find his way in this world.

Today is the last day of my four day weekend. We'll head back home in a little bit... midday so as to avoid Atlanta's gridlock rush hours, hopefully. I'll work four days this week... have a regular two day weekend (which we'll spend up here because of Sarabeth's birthday party next Saturday)... I'll work Monday, be off Tuesday, work Wednesday - Friday and then... I'm not sure how the schedule goes from that point. I just know that it's gonna be busier after today and it will be a few weeks before I have another long weekend.

So... on the 4th day of a four day weekend... it's not hard to find Reasons to Love Monday!

1. Two babies scheduled to come into the world this week: one, the grandchild of my childhood friend Tracey. I'm soooo excited for her! And the other... one of the blogs I read, a couple who have battled infertility, had a half dozen miscarriages and really pulled out all the stops to make sure they could have a healthy baby. She is being induced today. Babies are proof that God intends for life to go on, I believe.

2. I've loved my time in the mountains but I've missed my mama and my Codester and my Marquee... and my Trouble kitty and all the other fur babies. Home is where the heart is.
Can't wait to get home to him!


3. I think there's another new episode of How I Met Your Mother on tonight.

4. The final debate is on tonight and... although it makes me CURRRRAZZZZZZZZY the way these things are skewed toward Obama... I mean, did you hear about MSNBC's Chris Matthews saying that it was unconstitutional for Romney to *challenge* a sitting President in a debate? Where was this clown during the Bush Administration? The closer we get to the election, the more irritated I become. I voted on Friday up here in White County - it took exactly nine minutes from the time I got out of my car to the time I got back in my car. I was proud to cast my vote and grateful for the opportunity to do so. This way... if things don't go the way I should over the next four years... I know I did everything I could. My grandma has also cast her vote... by absentee ballot.

5. It always makes me sad to leave this Mountain House but knowing that we'll be back - either Friday night or Saturday morning - makes it better. I love that we always have a little vacay spot waiting for us!

6. We've tried to keep things picked up along the way during our stay... so the effort involved in cleaning up, loading up the car, etc, is minimal. Austin has a lot of laundry to do... I have a lot of laundry to do... and since we don't have a washer and dryer here at the Mountain House, we'll tote it back with us. We also carry the trash back with us because it doesn't make sense to pay for a monthly trash removal service for a pick up once or twice a month. That's also why we don't have satellite tv hooked up here. Anyways... my point was that even though there's a little bit of effort involved in keeping our Mountain House beautiful, warm and inviting, it's entirely worth it!

7. Have I mentioned that my kid is back home? My baby bird is back in the nest! That's a huge reason to love Monday, even if I loved it last Monday too. It's costing me a chunk of change to keep him fed and comfortable and I can't seem to make him understand that my financial situation has changed drastically (and was never good to start with, can I get an amen?). I still would gladly spend any amount of money to have him with us and safe and I know a lot of parents who feel the same way. Prodigals... are still welcomed with open arms... even in this generation.

8. Speaking of generations... I spent many many many hours yesterday working on my genealogy. I'm following a twig that leads through Henry the 1st of England by legitimate and illegitimate heirs. His legitimate grandson, Henry II and his illegitimate great-granddaughter, Ida Isabella de Toesny, which I think makes them second cousins, once removed, or some such, had a child, Sir William FitzRoy Longspee, who was my 25x great grandfather through my father's father's line. I spent a lot of time researching the events and various records of these relationships to arrive at this conclusion, partly because I wanted to have more concrete resources than ancestry.com and partly because it was so durn interesting! This same William Longspee was my 25x great grandfather through another ancestor of this same line... the deeper I get into this process, working now with about seven thousand relatives, the more fascinating it becomes (to me, anyways). See below, if you're interested...

Otherwise... just hoping you all have a great week and that you find many, many Reasons to Love Monday!

First example:


Sir William FitzRoy "Longsword" Longespee, 3rd Earl of Salisbury (1152 - 1226)
is your 25th great grandfather
Son of Sir William FitzRoy "Longsword"
Daughter of William II
Son of Ela
Daughter of Hugh
Daughter of Alice, Baroness of Neville
Daughter of Margaret "Matilda", Baroness Ross
Son of Lady Ena
Son of Sir Knight Norman
Son of Robert Thomas Lord Mayor London
Son of Sir Thomas "knight"
Son of ROBERT
Son of John
Son of Robert
Son of Thomas
Son of Thomas Butcher
Son of Thomas
Daughter of JOHN
Son of Anna Amey
Son of David
Son of David
Son of Cornelius
Daughter of John
Son of Deborah Ann
Son of Elias M
Son of Theodore Stogden
Son of Bruce Bronson
Daughter of James Edward


and then we have


William Longespee (1152 - 1226)
is your 25th great grandfather
Daughter of William
Daughter of Ida
Daughter of Beatrice
Daughter of Maud
Daughter of Ada de
Daughter of Maud
Daughter of Maud
Son of Maud
Son of Sir Humphrey
Son of Sir Humphrey
Son of Humphrey
Son of HUMPHREY IV
Daughter of HUMPHREY V
Son of ELEANOR Ellen
Daughter of Johnis Stafford
Son of Audrey
Daughter of Christopher
Daughter of ELIZABETH
Daughter of Elizabeth Catherine Almay
Son of Rebecca
Son of Cornelius
Daughter of John
Son of Deborah Ann
Son of Elias M
Son of Theodore Stogden
Son of Bruce Bronson
Daughter of James Edward

So we have the family tree branching off in two different directions, a niece and aunt, Ela and Ida Longspee, who are my 23x and my 24x great grandmothers... and the branch reconnects with my 5x great-grandfather, whose parents were 18th cousins once removed... or some such!

Posted by Heather at 8:38 AM 1 comments  

Friday, October 19, 2012

Contentment is Born of Struggle

I know that our little corner of this planet is by no means the most beautiful view anywhere... but yet... when I look out at first light and see this.... I can't imagine anywhere I'd rather be.

There's something about it being a weekday... and knowing that you're gainfully employed... and knowing that you're not burning any vacation time, inconveniencing anyone by calling out sick, you're not derelict in your duty, you're just having a great, long weekend... there's something about it that is so restorative.

I would love... so very much... to wake up to this every morning. And I trust myself enough to believe that I would never come to take it for granted. Even though my struggles were many and mighty while this was my full-time home and I had a full-time job... the beauty that surrounds me here in these mountains was never wasted on me.

I have spent a good part of my 44 1/2 years on this earth trying to stretch myself to be who I thought I was supposed to be. I got married, had babies, bought a house, joined a church, got the kids involved in everything from Boy Scouts to Little League to dance class and ran around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to make it all fit in my life and make me fit in all of those roles while trying to keep the bills paid and the lights on and a car in the driveway. Once I became a single mom the work load doubled and I had to add "find a man" to my list of things to do. I sit here now... in the stillness... listening to the birds singing outside and I feel, more than any other time or season or stage in my life, the most complete I have ever felt. I have so much less than I once had and yet it feels like so much more.

I'm not sure you can get here... to a point of contentment... without having been there... in a place of struggle... I know a lot of people for whom things have come much easier but I don't know anybody who is content just because of the amount of money in their bank accounts or the stability of their relationships or their job title... I believe contentment is born from struggle.

I spent my whole life thinking that unless I had a significant other, my life would be insignificant. Other than giving me three amazing sons, having a mate never served any valuable purpose in my life, in actuality, they all added a dimension of struggle, another layer of conflict and disappointment that I shouldn't have ever allowed to enter my life. I know for some people it's different. I believe that healthy marriages and stable families are the backbone of our society and I'm glad there are many such situations that surround me. But I don't believe that single means lonely.

During our drive up yesterday Austin and I were discussing Purple Michael and how excited and delighted we are that he is going to be in Atlanta for a few months. Austin talked about texting Michael... and I told Austin that there was a day recently that Michael was having a particularly hard day and had received Austin's text and been particularly touched by the reminder that although he's never been a biological father, he has truly fathered many children, including mine. Austin has been in Atlanta with me for the past week. His biological father has been *right next door* twice a day, picking up Cody for work and dropping him off after work and he has never made any attempt to see Austin. It bothers Austin... but he admitted yesterday that he would be more offended if Purple Michael was nearby and didn't attempt to see him. He's the one who invested the most into Austin's life. He said... "He's like a mother to me".

That conversation evolved into a discussion about the other people who have influenced Austin, from teachers and youth leaders to uncles and his Pop. I would have loved to have stayed married and raised my children with the man who gave them life... but that man wasn't willing - or maybe he just wasn't able - to fulfill that role. Yet the role was filled in many wonderful and diverse ways.

Likewise, my happily ever after never happened. The ones I married didn't love me and the ones I loved didn't marry me. And although I could easily list the material things that are missing in my life (a retirement account, a newer car, a home of my own, etc) I am so incredibly content... drinking my cup of very strong coffee... looking out at the mist rising from the lake... basking in the perfection of a four day weekend... my life is good, y'all.

Hope yours is too. Love and hugs.

Posted by Heather at 8:25 AM 0 comments  

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Thankful Thursday - From the Mountain House

I'm curled up in the recliner at the mountain house... fuzzy blanket, fuzzy pjs, fuzzy socks... nursing a mug of hot chocolate and wondering if 7pm is too early to go to sleep.

The work day was long but not too long. The drive up was swift but we still took time to stop and smell the roses have an early dinner at Cracker Barrel. The skies were gray with little pockets of sunshine spotlighting fall colors. The view from the back porch was...

 something like this... like a Whispering Bob Ross painting. 

It's been a good day. And yes, I think if I was a real student of the School of Gratitude, I would express all the things for which I'm thankful at the start, instead of the end of Thankful Thursday, but sometimes you just have to get to the end of the day to really count your blessings. Here are mine, in no particular order:

1. Fuzzy socks
2. Fuzzy pjs 
3. Fuzzy blankets (I'm obviously working backwards)
4. Having my kid nearby 
5. A safe *and swift* drive to the mountains
6. Mountain views and vistas without nauseating, scary mountain roads.
7. Cracker Barrel. The country fried steak and gravy isn't as good as Pop's but it will do in a pinch.
8. Clove gum (sold at Cracker Barrel) which Austin described as a cross between Big Red and Juicy Fruit.
9. Comfy furniture in the living room of the mountain house - not having to go up and down stairs to nest.
10. Ice cream in the freezer.
11. Four whole days off!
12. Peace and quiet.
13. Real darkness... the kind where the inky black envelops you like a blanket and you can actually see the stars.
14. Finding pictures that I had taken and not yet downloaded like this... and this.... 
 and this one too...
 
15. A Disco Ball for the Whine Cellar aka the basement aka my suite... which Austin is happily enjoying this weekend... with his tv and xbox and so forth....  
Life is good, y'all. 


Posted by Heather at 7:16 PM 0 comments  

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Crazy

I have to leave for work in 15 minutes.
The glam routine is finished.
I straightened my hair but shouldn't have because it's frizzing like crazy.
I am in a bad cycle of being in too much pain to sleep and being in pain because I can't sleep.
Some of you will *get* that and some will think I'm crazy.
Twice in five sentences I've used the word crazy. No relation.
Well, I suppose some of my relations are crazy.
All of my relationships have been, that's for sure.
My friend Amy aka Vicky Lynn has lost a bunch of weight and looks so hot that her husband went shopping with her.
She's awesome and I miss her like crazy. Crazy.
Oscar the dog just crawled in beside me.
That's a time suck because he's got to get positioned *just right* before he settles down...
And then there's that whole process of reassuring Trouble that he is still my boy and that I love him, even though there's a dog beside me.
Oh! Good. Oscar decided to make a nest out of my covers.
And... nope. He's back beside me, snout under my fingers while I type.
I'm just *this side* of grumpy.
I'm just worn out in a way that it's impossible to understand.
Yesterday I took a life insurance sales class (I hate those but I do as I'm told) and I was given *homework* of calling 48 people a day for the three days (at that point) that I work this week.
Well, to be precise, we were given six pages with 24 names per page to work before our next class next Tuesday.
I reminded our instructor (who is not my direct supervisor, manager, agent, etc) that I am part-time.
Her advice was that I use my time away from the office (off payroll) to take care of things that I don't have time to do at work.
Totally sent me into a panic attack.
It was that *one more thing* that pushed me over the cliff.
I love my job. I'm good at it, I really am. Ask anybody that works there.
But for an outside person who doesn't have a clue what my work load is (about the same as a full time person) to put demands on my time away from work and off the payroll...
When I already have to figure out when I'm going to do my continuing ed that has to be done and paid for asap.
Plus handle the additional logistics of Austin doing... who knows what he's going to do?
But whatever it is, he needs help and I'm his mother, you do the math.
I'm not in the stage of life where I'm building a career.
I'm in the stage of life where I praise God for every day that I manage to drag myself to work and spend five hours not letting anyone know how badly I hurt and how exhausted I am.
I answer the phone with a smile and a great attitude, every. single. time.
Ask anybody.
If I can work another two years, I'll be so grateful.
But what I'm doing is all I can do.
Most days I'm too tired to eat.
And too tired to sleep, which I know sounds crazy.
Back to crazy.
And out of time.
I've tried to not have any Whiny Wednesdays lately but here I am... whining again.
Forgive me Lord.
Heading out the door to grab a pumpkin spice latte and the artificial pleasure that brings.
Love and hugs, y'all.

Posted by Heather at 8:17 AM 2 comments  

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Pax Adsit - Jacob Lumpkin

Pax adsit - may peace be with him.

Happy Tuesday, y'all! I'm still aching and having a little trouble with that blasted left leg but I'm awake and about to start the glam routine so I can head into work. I'm on the early schedule for the next three days so I have to leave the house by 8:30, a little earlier today because I need to stop and get gas. But... if all goes well, I'll be home and settled into my pjs by 3pm every day except Thursday... when I hope to be on the road by 3pm and settled in at the mountain house by 5pm, Lord willing. Not a bad deal. Not bad at all.

Yesterday was a good day but I was absolutely wiped out by the end of the day. Having Austin here in Riverdale reduces some stress for me - as far as worrying about my kid - but it increases stress for me in that he's not a kid any more but also not an adult and still has some of those autistic traits that have made interaction with him difficult all of his life. I am still trusting God for this kid's future. We'll try to get some details sorted out while we're in the mountains this weekend. I just want him to be as settled and independent as my older two... there was a time of transition for them too and I want to be as supportive as I can be of Austin. I love him. He's my heart. Y'all know that. But dad-gum... he wears me out sometimes.

Anyways... I've got an ancestor that I'd like to share with you. At least, I believe him to be an ancestor. Insert usual disclaimer here - my research is based heavily on ancestry.com and I have not independently confirmed all of these family connections and/or details so this is either a cool bit of history on my 9x great-grandfather OR a cool bit of American History.



Captain Jacob Lumpkin was a military man, a Captain in the British army during the French and Indian Wars.
He lived on a plantation in Newington, south of the Mattaponi River in Virginia.
In 1676 there is a record that he was paid 3000 pounds and again 750 pounds of tobacco for services and charge of Mattaponi Fort.
The records of Middlesex County have a statement dated 2 October 1677 indicating that 18 men had been sent out of that county to join the command of Captain Jacob Lumpkin.
In 1690 he was brought up on charges for uttering "Seditious, unlawful & dangerous words" in his refusal to toast King William and Mary.
He was cleared.
In 1691 he was granted land in Drysdale Parish, King & Queen County, Virginia.
He also received land grants in Hanover and Caroline Counties.
The list of Virginia military officers in 1698 names Jacob Lumpkin as one of four Captains in the County.
He was in command of 98 men, the largest of the four contingents.
In 1704 both Jacob and a Robert Lumpkin were on the 'Quit Rent' rolls of King and Queen County, Virginia.
Jacob was assessed for 950 acres and Robert for 400.
Jacob was buried at the Mattaponi church which was so close to his home that the foundation remains of his house can still be seen from the church door.
The original house burned to the ground during the Civil War.
The church is northeast of Richmond, inland from Chesapeake Bay, on the Mattaponi River in King & Queen County, St. Stephen's parish, Virginia.
The church may have been built as early as 1690.
 A marble slab near the north door is Jacob's memorial.
The Latin inscription reads, after his name and date,

Dux Militum,
Victor Hostium
Morte Victus.
Pax adsit,
vives requias
Eterna Sepultis.


   "A leader of soldiers; conqueror of the enemy    Conquered by death.    May peace be with him: he shall live.    Eternal rest for the buried."
Jacob and Ann's great, great grandson Wilson Lumpkin served in the US House of Representative, the US Senate and two terms as Governor of Georgia (1831-1835).
Other 'illustrious' descendants include Carter Braxton, grandson of their daughter Mary and a signer of the Declaration of Independence
and William Clark of the famous 'Lewis and Clark' expedition who was a great-grandson of their daughter Elizabeth.


Jacob Lumpkin (1644 - 1708)
is your 9th great grandfather
Daughter of Jacob
Son of Elizabeth Ann
Daughter of James B
Son of Elizabeth
Son of William
Son of William Bartlett
Son of William Guy
Daughter of Thomas Alexander
Daughter of Mary Alice
Daughter of Virginia
Daughter of Norma Ray

Posted by Heather at 7:16 AM 0 comments  

Monday, October 15, 2012

Up All Night and Just Wanna Go Back To Sleep Reasons to Love Monday

I had such a rough night that I'm tempted to swear, except I try not to. My back was hurting so bad that I got out of bed and got into the recliner with the heating pad. This normally will take the edge off things to the point that I can sleep and might have worked if not for a little kitty who wanted treats and kept whining and patting me on the arm trying to get treats. I woke up to a bad storm... which sort of explains the back pain that woke me up. Bad weather = arthritis flare = muscle spasms + pain = grumpy Monday.

Seriously, I very nearly just got up, took another ambien with a nyquil chaser and made this a "sleep it away Monday". Instead, I poured me a big cup of coffee... cuddled up with the Oscar dog and decided to try to find some Reasons to Love Monday. Help me Jesus.

1.  Ten. She's ten. How did that happen? Where did the time go? And how did we get so blessed as to have an angel girl who is beautiful, kind and smart? I can't wait until her birthday party at the end of this month. She thinks it's cool that she is my facebook profile picture right now. Our family waited thirty four years after me to have a girl born into our family and she was worth the wait!

 2. He's here. He still wants to live in the mountains and this little detour is temporary, he hopes. They got evicted from the house they were living in... he has plans to get an apartment with Fat Pat but he has to have a job first. In the meantime... he's crashing here on the couch and at least for a little while I don't have to worry about where he is or what he's doing or whether he's eating or wearing clean clothes. The important thing is that he came here by choice and he remembered that I had told him I would always be here for him. We had a great lunch out yesterday and although he's changed the dynamics around here... he's here. God is good.

 3. And what, you say, makes a dog peeing a "Reason to Love Monday"? It just makes me laugh, that's all. Crazy dog who thinks he must have human body heat or else he'll die. If my mom starts getting ready he comes to find me. I got up for a few minutes and I come back to find he's bogarted my heating pad. He's a rotten little dog and I missed him while he was in the mountains with the parents. 

4. This is one of those days that I don't know that I can make it through my abbreviated work day but it's one of those days that I'm still gonna try. I love my job. I want to be there, even if it hurts.

5. How I Met Your Mother is on tonight. New episode. 

6. Three more sleeps, twenty hours at work, one hundred miles and I'm back at the Mountain House for four nights. Four peaceful days of reading, internetting (I made that word up), enjoying the peace and quiet and all that. Plus job hunting with Austin, advance voting, hopefully updating my drivers license and getting Austin's benefit stuff straightened out. 

7. Tomorrow is payday. 

 8. My sweet Jamie-gurl... our little cheerleader. She is soooo much my mini-me! She makes the world a better place just by being in it. 

 9. She's such a good big sister. She was helping Jamie with her worms. Bait worms, that is. Our Mountain House is (for most everyone except me) our family's favorite fishing hole. (I don't fish). 

 10. Ten years ago yesterday I started working for State Farm. Other than my unintentional sabbatical this year, it's been my career, my identity. It wasn't what I "wanted to be when I grew up" but it's been a good way to make a living and even though it's going to hurt.... even though it's gonna be a struggle... getting to get up and go to a job I love is a HUGE Reason to Love Monday.

I hope you find a few of your own reasons. Happy Monday, y'all. 


Posted by Heather at 7:40 AM 0 comments  

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