My People

My People
My matched set of grandchildren - Oliver and Cosette

Thursday, April 2, 2009

teenager for sale

The phone is ringing and I'm not answering it so if it's you, I'm sorry.

People are getting on my nerves today. Ok. Not all people. But enough people that I am done with people for the day. Email me. Oh. I have a couple of emails that I haven't responded to. I will. Later. Right now I'm just grumpy.

I am so sick of Austin not doing his chores. So sick. Today I screamed myself hoarse at him. I'm not really a screamer. Usually when I'm angry I speak soft and slow thru clenched teeth. Austin has had the same chore expectations since the day we moved in here. He has YET to have completed them before I get home. What's worse... when I come home and get on to him about his chores he gets mad at ME for fussing at him. I'm so done. I feel like I traded one prison for another. I'm not a slave driver. His chores essentially consist of him cleaning up behind himself. Horrible things like... not throwing his clothes and shoes in the middle of my living room.... Yes, I'm a mean mother. Today I told him that if his chores were done when I got home that we'd order pizza. They weren't done. We aren't ordering pizza. He asked if we could order once he finished his chores. That wasn't the offer... if his chores were DONE when I got home. He just doesn't get the whole concept of following directions. When he got ugly with me about his no pizza punishment I told him he could spend his spring break at home learning how to do chores.

Now. Seriously. I am not really interested in keeping him here during spring break. He wants to see his dad - who he hasn't seen since Thanksgiving since his dad stood him up on Christmas. He wants to visit with mawmaw and pop. I want/need a break. I went from the hospital to the stress of finding a job and a home to the stress of being in the midst of being a single, full-time working mom. I haven't had the opportunity to catch my breath. I've dealt with a series of illnesses for the past year that have been unrelenting. I. need. a. break. But I also need something that will get his attention.

So now... he's in his room pouting. Not cleaning, not trying to earn grace... just having a good old fashioned tantrum. That's ok. You can't out-tantrum me!

Whatever happened to thankful Thursday? Hmmm... let me see what I can work up... it was another crazy busy day at work. I sold a life policy... it's about $50 worth of commission... not huge but it's $50 I didn't have before. If I could sell one policy like that a day, I would actually be able to pay all my bills in the same month I incurred them. What a novel idea!

I really wanted pizza for dinner. That whole thing, "this hurts me more than it hurts you..." sometimes holds true.


Estela said...

Heather, I feel your pain! I still have to remind my kids to do their chores. It's the same ones every day... dishes, clean room, clean cat box, clean up after self. You'd think they could do it in their sleep by now. I hate that I have to remind them.

Missie said...

Life with a teenager! Been there, still doing it! Hang in there! I think it gets better when they turn 30! LOL

Anonymous said...

Hmmm... Question Time!

How much of this is that he's a teenage boy and how much is related to aspergers? Is Austin classified as HFA?

Have you considered taking small steps of cleaning and putting them into his sequence? My understanding of Aspergers people is that heuristics are a way to learn social function.

FOR Each of your meals you eat:
IF you want Pizza THEN you must finish your education WHILE you DO your chores, and
NEXT meal
IF you have THREE meals, THEN sleep!

Make sense?

It may not apply here, but it might help.

Maire said...

Ahhhh, must be on the same wavelength on my daughter about the same exact thing, so sick of the tantrums, she actually had bio dad pick her up...I'm letting her sit and stew, went through this last year, she went to dads twice, then figured she had it better here...we will see. hugs, Maire

Unknown said...

oh...the same problem is going on here with my 3

Cassey said...

Yep....been there, done that..... But once you find something that works, stick to it, because you will never find anything else!

I am with you on the job front, too. I just started loan processing from home, and I only get paid if I close a loan. If I could just close two a week, life would be great!