There is a busy week ahead and (of course) I woke up with (hopefully my last round of) Evil Gut Pain. I'm going to just hang out here in the nest and let the meds do their job and do my best to find lots and lots of Reasons To Love THIS Monday!
Monday, April 25, 2016
Posted by Heather at 9:12 AM
Friday, April 22, 2016
Since then... I've had a visit with my Ollie which was amazing and exhausting. He is seriously freakishly strong! I tried to pry a cup with a straw out of his hand and he was pulling me down with it. BAM BAM! He has the most beautiful eyelashes and he's busy and curious and always on the move... nobody else heard it but I promise he said, "Nana" plain as day. He was hanging off of my shirt and saw the chapstick I always have tucked away in my bra and questioned me, "Nana?" and grabbed the chapstick. I melted! Just like Cosy, I taught him how to put it on (with the cap on) so that he could give good kisses.
While I was with Oliver I had an ugly migraine and because I was not in my nest I didn't get it under control so I had the full fledged puking-my-guts-up pain response that I do my best to avoid. At home I have the perfect position and the perfect temperature and can manage any and every possible variable to get pain under control and it just didn't work for me there. Episodes like that are terrifying to me. They are my primary reason for sticking so close to home and minimizing my social appearances. I don't like for anyone to see me in pain like that. I don't like complaining about pain (although it may seem like it sometimes because I do it so often!) and it's just really embarrassing to me when it gets that bad. I don't want anyone else to feel bad because I feel bad.
|Those legs! Little hamhocks!|
This morning I was back on Nana duty with Miss Cosy who has been dealing with an ear infection this week. I cut up half a banana for her breakfast and put it in a bowl. She reached for the uncut half and ate it instead. Miss Independent!
(next day) Not good at finishing blogs lately. Yesterday I went to Gainesville for a surgical consult for the Dr who is doing my hysterectomy since my regular gyn can't do the robotic method, which he thinks will be better for my body type. Turned out that my appointment is actually TODAY so it was a wasted hour and a half drive. I stopped by Subway so it at least felt like the journey had purpose. Hopefully TODAY I will find out when I can have the surgery (and start being anxious about it). The Subway sandwich was quite good, though.
|Helping Dad in the yard|
Then the news came out that Prince had died... that sort of grabbed my attention. I wasn't really a huge fan - but honestly, I've never been THAT into popular music. I still am primarily into showtunes and Christian music and don't even listen to much that often. But Prince reminds me of my youth. I remember singing Little Red Corvette on the swings at a hotel in Savannah where my friend Susie's parents had taken us over the weekend of my 12th birthday. I remember in the bus heading to youth camp when my friend Stacy said, "have you heard that new song When Dogs Cry?" I still sing it that way... when Darby reformatted my iPod for me and put Darling Nikki in my exercise playlist. Prince was only ten years older than me and there is so much mystery around his passing. I'm not much of a music fan but I am intrigued by the story.
|Playing with his water table, wearing his shades|
I am still on a break from sewing. Just haven't picked it back up. I am working on my Italian though and have over one hundred days in a row of working on the Duolingo app. It says I'm 5% fluent now. I feel like I know a lot of words but I'm still sooooo slow at interpreting things.
One more week to Cosy's first birthday... one more week to my 48th. My mom did a huge deep cleaning and reorganization of the entire Whine Cellar while I was gone so that leaves less on the to-do-list for Cosette's birthday party but there are still many details to be done. First party in the Whine Cellar but at least I won't have far to go!
Hope life is being kind to you all! Love and hugs!
|BONUS! Sarabeth and Jamie @ Kiwanis Talent Show|
Don't forget to read the previous blog post (if you're interested) to find out about my dry socket and new muscle relaxer.
Posted by Heather at 10:32 AM
These two topics will sum up the past week: dry socket and zanaflex
Dr. Google, DDS says this:
Dry socket can occur three to four days after an adult tooth is removed. The blood clot that should form after removal is dislodged or dissolved before the wound heals, exposing underlying bone and nerves.
- Dull, aching, throbbing pain in the area of the socket, which is moderate to severe and may radiate to other parts of the head such as the ear, eye, temple and neck. The pain normally starts on the second to fourth day after the extraction, and may last 10–40 days. The pain may be so strong that even strong analgesics do not relieve it.
- Intraoral halitosis (oral malodor).
- Bad taste in the mouth.
Posted by Heather at 10:31 AM
Wednesday, April 6, 2016
(started this yesterday... got too sleepy and had to hit pause)
Had a tooth pulled this morning so I'm a bit out of sorts... what better time to blog, right?
I'm still enjoying the after effects of the numbing shots. My tongue still feels twice it's normal size. I dread what it will feel like once those wear off. A note about the numbing stuff... I've been having a hard time getting the shakes and feeling my heart racing about five minutes after those injections. I discussed it with the dental assistant last time and she said it was the epinephrine that caused those side effects. This time I drank only a half cup of coffee and made sure to eat a good, filling breakfast and... no shakes! I'm glad. The alternative that we discussed offered less pain relief and ... well, no.
My breakfast was the leftovers from my lunch yesterday. I just had to get out of the house yesterday. I've had this recurring vertigo that strikes out of nowhere and makes me nervous to drive. (By the way, thanks Carol for the link to the video for curing vertigo. It didn't help in my case but it's always good to try any and every method that doesn't cost anything or involve medication!) I was a little bit - not a lot - dizzy yesterday and really just wanted to go out to eat, especially with the expectation of having a tooth pulled today and possibly not being able to eat well for a time. Tasha, Cosette and I went to Cafe Cancun, a mexican restaurant in town. The food was really, really good and I got some absolutely precious pictures of Cosy experiencing the wonder that is nachos and cheese. Once I can chew again, we're going back! I had a dish that was grilled chicken and shrimp with cheese eaten on a tortilla with guacamole and sour cream. It was awesome and their rice was also awesome, not too spicy!
Cosette is getting lightning fast with her butt crawling and looks like she has no intention of crawling the traditional way. She was downstairs in my Whine Cellar last night and it looked like a tornado had come through! There are so many toys and stuffed and animals and books that she just scoots around exploring one treasure after another. She's even fascinated with my flash cards I made to study Italian. Of course Nanas always want their grandbabies to want to come see them and I'm glad Cosy has fun at Nana's "house".
She did something really brilliant yesterday... she was scrolling through my pictures on my phone and she got to a point where she couldn't get it to do what she wanted so she grabbed my hand and put it on the phone! She knew Nana could do it! I have an otter box on my phone and always supervise her closely while she plays with it. It helps if she has a pacifier in her mouth while she's looking at it so she isn't tempted to use it as a teething toy.
Baby Girl loves toys and stuffed animals and anything/everything that crosses her path but the first thing she always gravitates toward are her books! She will sit and flip through books over and over. Last week she started verbalizing things she recognized in her books... she'll point to a dog and say, "oof" (her word for dog) or point to a baby and say, "bobo" (her word for baby). I think that's a sign of potential to be an early reader. She also has favorite pages in every book... she'll flip pages back and forth until she finds that one certain place and then she wants to stay there for a bit. When I read to her I always end with "and they lived happily ever after"... because every story should end that way, shouldn't it?
Not to brag too much but she picks up on things really quickly. For example... there's a cat toy, a tiny mouse with a little tail. I swing it in circles to tease the cats. Ever since she saw me do that she takes the toy and tries to spin it in circles every time! I put my goody bands for my hair on her wrist like a bracelet because she is fascinated with the bracelets Cousin Jamie wears. Now every time she finds a hairband she tries to put it on like a bracelet. I always squeal when she pulls my hair so she will grab two handfuls and squeal in the same pitch that I do. She laughs and laughs that pulling hair makes Nana squeal. (we may need to crack down on the hair pulling before she goes to preschool).
I could go on and on. We are all, everyone in this house, completely in love with this tiny little princess. It's so hard to believe that she's already turning one. In some ways I want her to stay tiny forever but honestly, each and every new stage, every new word, every single thing she learns is so exciting and wonderful to experience with her!
Having her here and participating in her day to day life makes my heart ache more and more for Oliver. I feel like I miss so much of his life. Cody is good to Facetime and send videos and pictures but it's not the same as sitting on the floor playing with them and having our special things we do together. I'm trying to figure out a way to get down to spend quality "in real life" time with Ollie before my hysterectomy. My vertigo can be so vicious and comes out of nowhere so I'm afraid to make the 100 mile journey but I also hate for anyone else to have to chauffeur me back and forth. Having a tooth pulled yesterday was not factored into my life this month... I thought I'd have a solid week between seeing the pain doctor and having my surgical consult and hoped that would make it possible to go down next week. Now I have to contend with the follow up with the dentist.. getting stitches out,.. and hope against hope that I don't have to deal with dry sockets or infection like the past removals. The last two extractions involved a lot of follow up visits. It's frustrating to be so near but still so far.
At any rate... these children are without a doubt, among the greatest blessings in my life. I feel like everything I've ever had to struggle with in my life, anything I had to get through to be HERE is worth it to be in this place in life now... and to have these two babies to love.
And I guess that's about it for now... this latest round of pain meds is kicking in and making me woozy. Love and hugs, y'all!
Posted by Heather at 12:50 PM
Thursday, March 31, 2016
I'm still dealing with extraordinary dizziness so instead of a wordy post, I thought I'd share a few photos with you.
First... my Acorn Stairlift was installed yesterday. I'm grateful to have it but hate that I have to have it. The Occupational Therapy student for whom I am a Community Partner was at the house when he was finishing up and took it for a test ride after I had taken my (very embarrassing) maiden voyage. I was afraid the seatbelt wouldn't go around me (it did). I was afraid it would groan and struggle to haul me up the stairs (it didn't, worked just fine)
(Sorry Jess... I didn't have the pictures you took of me and I'm SURE you look better than I do in it anyways!)
It's a very bizarre feeling, like you're flying... but it's also a bizarre feeling to get to the top of the staircase and not be limping or out of breath. It's rather bland, though. I'd like to "pimp my ride" and bedazzle it or some how dress it up. I couldn't find anything under "stairlift accessories" other than extra batteries. Maybe a niche business someone could get into...
I snagged these pictures without permission but they're my two current favorites of Oliver. Little Man is walking behind a push toy, just like his older cousin... and yesterday Cody sent me a video of Ollie trying to climb the wall. He's a mess! Cody was a happy and content baby and Ollie takes after him.
Cosy is now 11 months old. We tried to get a good picture with her 11 month sticker but she is too mobile and too curious to sit still when there was a giant sticker just waiting for her to chew on it.
Also, I accidentally left the watermark from the last set of photos I edited on Cosy's 11 month pictures. That's why they all say, "Oliver" in the bottom corner.
Lastly... some way back when photos that one of the girls I cheered with in Junior High posted last week...
You'll note that we are wearing the old fashioned saddle oxfords. That was pretty much the last year that school cheerleaders (at least in my area) wore saddle oxfords. After that they changed to tennis shoes which makes WAY more sense!
It's weird to look at old photos and not recognize yourself.
And that's my photo dump for the day! Love and hugs, y'all!
Posted by Heather at 9:24 AM
Monday, March 28, 2016
Steroid shots are now on my list of "not worth it" because I really believe that the only pain relief I've gotten for my shoulder has come from resting it/not sewing. I have felt unwell ever since the last shot - fluish, dizzy, extremely tired. The tooth began abscessing - it hurts down into my jaw and back to my ear and eating has been a challenge (don't worry, I'm up to the challenge!). I already had a dentist appointment scheduled for tomorrow so it will be addressed soon. I don't know if there is a direct connection between tooth decay and steroids but it seems like that shot just set off a whole new level of ick in my world.
I'm also going through a rough round of the evil gut pain. TMI BEGINS HERE, Skip down if you want to avoid it. Just to sort of recap - the evil gut pain was diagnosed last July as post ablation tubal ligation syndrome. A uterine ablation is where they go in and scar the uterus to keep it from developing the monthly lining. The intention is to eliminate heavy periods and pain that seem to plague women of a certain age - post childbirth, pre-menopause - in an effort to avoid a hysterectomy. What has happened in my case (and, it appears is happening frequently) is that the entire surface did not scar so there are places in my uterus where the normal monthly lining develops but the scar tissue from the parts that did scar correctly prevents the lining from shedding, as in a normal period. This trapped lining becomes an ever greater problem because my tubes are tied... normally, trapped blood, etc would sort of back up into the tubes toward the ovaries. So my un-shed lining is just all trapped there causing inflammation and putting pressure on the surrounding organs. The medical term is hematrometra. This post ablation syndrome could be responsible for a lot of the issues I have - everything from back pain to hip pain to cramps to migraines - or at least, the post ablation issue is exacerbating my already existing problems. There are two ways to resolve the post ablation syndrome: menopause or hysterectomy.
New paragraph. Same story. Last Summer when I was diagnosed I was under charity care through the local hospital. My situation was not potentially life threatening so I could not get approved for a hysterectomy at that time. Not long after that I was approved for social security and I became covered under Medicare in September. Theoretically I could have gone back then and requested the hysterectomy but ... by that time we were working on my massive dental issues and then my mom got sick and... well, it just hasn't happened. There was supposed to be some coordination between the gyn and my pain doctor where I received additional pain meds / stronger pain meds to deal with the post ablation syndrome but those dots never connected. And honestly... I really don't want to take more pain meds. I want to have less pain. So I finally summoned up the courage to make an appointment with the gyn and saw him last week. He agrees that it's time for a hysterectomy, there's no reason to put it off and it will make a big difference in the amount of pain I'm in.
Because I carry a little extra weight around my middle (aka the Buddha Belly) they can't do a laparoscopic hysterectomy on me but also, because I'm heavy there's a greater risk in doing the abdominal hysterectomy. The gyn thinks I'll do best with a robotic hysterectomy because the incisions are higher up, at the thinner part of me. My gyn doesn't do the robotic kind but another doctor in his practice does. I'm set for a consultation with him on April 21st to determine a date for the surgery. We're doing Cosette's First Birthday Party in my house so I wanted to postpone the surgery until at least May. So sometime in May - or possibly later - I'll go in for the big snip.
I'm happy to have the prospect of less pain in my life but really anxious about the post surgery pain. More pain to be able to have less pain... just got to get through the more pain part. I've been watching youtube videos of this particular surgery and in a way, it helps to see what they do but what I really want to see are testimonials of women who have had as much pain as I have with this post ablation syndrome and are basking in the afterglow of their hysterectomy.
And that was way more than I thought I had to share! TMI ENDS HERE
My mom is currently in New York loving on her 14th grandchild. It's kinda funny that my new nephew is the first grandchild on his mom's side and the 14th on his dad's! It's surreal to see my brother - who we always thought would be the bachelor uncle - being a doting dad. #meltsmyheart They are not putting baby boy on social media but I think I can tell you that he has red hair- and we all know how partial I am to my redheaded nieces- so I am thrilled to have a little redheaded nephew!
Mom is having trouble with her blood sugar, which we expected since they took most of her pancreas. The started her on insulin injections on Friday and she left for New York on Saturday morning. I was really anxious about her having a blood sugar issue while she was traveling alone and threatened to pin a note to her shirt that said, "mawmaw has diabetes" but she made it fine. I'm getting lots of extra Oscar love since he needs constant contact with a human to survive and Pop doesn't sit still for long. Still glad I made the investment in a wider recliner so I can accommodate a passenger. Little Kitty is NOT appreciating the extra Oscar time. He even made the clicking sound he makes when he's hunting toward Oscar yesterday. He's seriously ready to eliminate the little doggie from his mommy's chair.
I had a rough night one night last week and got inspired to fix Easter baskets for the babies. I dragged my mom along with me Thursday afternoon to Walmart to get all the goods for the baskets. Mawmaw contributed as well. We also got our hair cut last week - it only took 11 months for us to manage to find a day where we both felt like doing it and Gail was available. My cut was mostly a trim with the same hairstyle but Gail "texturized" my hair, thinning it out a bit. When I was done it looked like someone had shaved a caveman. Mom's hair had not grown much, which turns out to be a side effect of being so terribly unwell with the cancer. I had never thought about it but it makes sense.
I snagged a picture of my nieces with their bestie, Jorjanne from yesterday. I thought I'd show you another picture of the three to give you some perspective of how quickly they grow - how time flies. The second picture was from 2012, just four years ago! And the last one is Jorjanne and Sarabeth at Christmastime in 2008. Time has flown!
Posted by Heather at 10:22 AM
Friday, March 18, 2016
Tuesday, March 15
Birthday of the Lovely Lady Sara who is my daughter-in-law to be. Mailed her card on her actual birthday despite having purchased it in early February. Because, you know, I have so much to do... *eyeroll*
Woke up with a nasty migraine at three am. Advil helped.
Took Austin to get his haircut. Tasha, Cosy and I had breakfast at the Corner Grill next door while he had his haircut. I had crispy hashbrowns with an egg fried over medium on top. It was good but not as good as the crispy corned beef hash with a fried egg on top that Austin made me last week. Tasha also had an egg fried over medium and hers had runny whites so... she didn't enjoy hers as much.
Went to Rite Aid to pick up meds. Bought two more books for Cosy (ninety cents each) and a new toy for Oscar (also ninety cents). Thought I bought Starburst Jelly Beans (my second favorite to Jellie Bellies) but bought regular starbursts instead. I can't eat the regular starbursts.
The Amish Bakery (formally known as The Country Bake Shoppe) reopened. They close between the beginning of January and the middle of March every year. The bakery opening is a sure sign of Spring. Although we really didn't need anything we stopped by so Austin could introduce Cosy to the lady who manages the shop. She always asks about Austin if he isn't with me. She remembers him from when we first moved here so she was tickled to meet his little girl. Bought a pound cake to celebrate Mawmaw and Pop's 50th anniversary and a frozen lasagna for us to eat while the parents are out celebrating their anniversary.
The nasty migraine kept returning every time the advil wore off.
Pop fixed pancakes and sausage for dinner. It was good but my reflux has returned with an ugly vengeance and I'm afraid it may be because I reintroduced coffee into my life. *sad face*
March 16 - Wednesday
It's my parents 50th anniversary! So proud of their lasting love and the example they live for all of us Gants.
Again with the headache.
Had a day that felt unproductive. Didn't manage to sew for long because my shoulder(s) are killing me. Anxious about the steroid injection in my shoulder on Friday, especially since my hip has felt worse and I've had more trouble walking since that injection.
Reflux continues. Swallowing tums by the handful. I mean, after I chew them.
It's been nice and warm outside. I've been keeping the door to my screened porch open all day and the cats are loving it! Little Kitty has been terrorizing all the local birds and lizards.
Picked Austin up from work and took advantage of the trip into town to stock my fridge again. I'm trying really hard to eat healthier which means more frequent shopping.
My parents went out for dinner at Longhorn Steakhouse. I am hoping to do some sort of gathering/cook out/open house things for their anniversary while Bryan, Helen and their baby boy are here this summer.
Thursday, March 17
I'm 42% Irish so... I guess today is my day.
Fighting depression today because I'm just not able to do the things I want or need to do. Most of the time I just accept it but there are times that it makes me feel claustrophobic and unproductive.
I got some great Cosy time this morning since I'm having the shoulder injection thing tomorrow and won't be able to hold her for a few days. I seriously enjoy my time with her SO MUCH! We watched a couple of episodes of The Cat in the Hat. We have a ratty old stuffed one that was somebody's - don't know whose - but it ended up in my stuffed animal zoo. She understood (I think) that the stuffed version and the tv version were the same. She tries to sing along with the theme song. She's just a little sponge of knowledge. Pop always points at his eye, makes a letter C with his hands and points at her to say, "I see you" and now... she points at everyone when she first sees them. And sometimes she will point at Pop and very clearly say, "Pop".
Despite the occasional challenges of living in a four generation household, there are far more blessings than challenges. Think about it... Cosette has daily/weekly contact with her Nana, Mawmaw and Pop, Grandma and Grandpa and of course, two very devoted parents. So many kids have just one parent raising them with maybe a part-time, occasional someone else.
This week some of the things I've bought for her birthday party arrived. I got this huge window cling sort of thing that looks like a medieval castle. I bought a pink table cloth with white polka dots. I bought twinkle lights (even though it's a day time party). I bought a black foam board last week and this week I got the chalk marker set. We'll do a sort of first birthday stats on the foam board, along with photos of her monthly updates. It's coming together. There's a lot of work that will need to be done to turn my Whine Cellar into Party Central but I'm very excited to do it.
Friday, March 18th
Steroid injection in the shoulder. Not terrible but it's about seven hours later and the numbing meds are wearing off and I'm starting to feel some major discomfort.
Pop hung a shelf for me over my kitchen table. It's currently holding my lamp (for that end of the room) (I use lamps for lighting because the overhead lights are fluorescent and give me headaches) some less used canisters, my paper towel roll... cleared up a lot of space on my table/counter/work space. There's another shelf to be hung over my refrigerator. I need to organize my pantry shelf better. These things... projects I want to do and can't complete in one sitting... frustrates me.
Ok... typing hurts. That's the rest of the week for you! Have a great weekend, love and hugs, y'all!
Posted by Heather at 3:52 PM