My People

My People
My matched set of grandchildren - Oliver and Cosette

Sunday, May 20, 2018

Weekend Recap

Yikes.... I didn't blog yesterday! I had things swimming right along last week, with all of the weekday blogs written by Monday afternoon and then... Harry and Meghan got married and I was so caught up in the magic that I couldn't even stop to blog. That's not entirely true. Last week I struggled quite a bit with migraines. I had a significant headache almost every day. FORTUNATELY... I had already written several blog posts so it didn't matter. I did not have one written for yesterday and I had a miserable headache so... there ya go. Real life strikes again.

Today my head is a tad bit better but there's still a headache lurking. I can function to a certain degree with a headache but one problem I have is that I can't focus my vision. This makes blogging or reading really tricky. Please overlook any spelling mistakes in this blog post. I have a theory that every time I stop drinking powerade/gatorade, I get headaches. Last week I thought I'd try flavored water instead and... it may very well be a coincidence but all I know is I have had a headache every day. You better believe I'm pounding back the powerade today!

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this in my blog - I've definitely mentioned it on Facebook - but Austin got his drivers license last week! For so many years he has just not felt confident enough to take the test and all of a sudden on Monday he decided to go the next day. He was off on Tuesday so we picked up Cosy and headed to Toccoa, a small town near us where there is a Department of Drivers Services office. Honestly, I thought... no way he goes through with it... but he did. And I thought for sure, if we just show up without an appointment there is no way they'll fit us in... but they did. And then we realized there wasn't current proof of insurance in that car but they gave us a fax number and I was able to call one of my lovely former co-workers at State Farm who kindly and quickly faxed over proof of insurance. I figured with as little experience as Austin has had driving, he surely wouldn't pass but I hoped that they would help him know what he needed to work on and we could return in a few weeks but... he passed. He actually did very well, including parallel parking which he had never done before. And lastly, I thought that even if he passed he would probably not be ready to start driving right away and would still take quite some time yet to be confident enough to drive independently. Well, that has just not been the case at all. He has driven himself to work and back twice, he has driven to friends' houses, he has gone into town a few times and he even picked Cosy up this morning all by himself.

Austin driving is a GAME CHANGER for me! I have struggled so much over the past few years with  being unable to take medication on schedule because I had to wait until after I picked up Austin as a few of my meds make it impossible to drive. I have had so many days where I really just had to suffer until he got off work. In turn, he has had many days where he would have stayed later at work but he knew I really needed to be "finished with my day". My dad helps some, especially if I'm struggling but my dad is gone ALL the time! He plays golf more days a week than not and he has so many obligations at church and in the community that he's just not available a lot of the time. It has been such a blessing the past few days for Austin to be able to get himself where he needed to be because my head has hurt so bad and driving was not going to be safe or comfortable for me.

I am definitely struggling with letting go of my last baby. I've been responsible for my kids for nearly 32 years now - literally my entire adult life. I don't know how to NOT have to worry about getting folks where they need to be. It's an empty nest syndrome that I wasn't prepared for because I truly had no idea that Austin would be driving NOW all of a sudden. I've had to be more involved with Austin than the others and I've had to be involved so much longer but he is definitely ready. I was a bit bummed last night when Austin told me he was going to pick Cosette up this morning because... that's MY THING... getting my sleepy girl first thing in the morning and having our little chats alone in the car on the way home... it's a very precious time for me. I felt... like nobody needs me anymore. But Marvin was sweet and practical and reminded me that I am still very much needed in their lives and of course, today Cosy ran straight to my room as soon as they got her and I still dressed her and fixed her hair and helped her go potty today (no accidents the whole time she was with us! Yay!). It's an adjustment but it's time for me to be able to take care of myself (and maybe finish the embroidery project I started for Marvin back before Christmas...)

Yesterday while I was feeling so awful Austin was able to run to Walmart for me. It's been so long since one of my kids has been able to do the shopping for me. Pop picked up meds for me this weekend while I was feeling poorly but I hate to send him with a list, especially a specific, picky one. I literally took pictures of the products I needed Austin to buy for me and, of course, he shops with me frequently so he knows what I buy and roughly the price range I find acceptable. He's a good shopper. I had thought so fondly of the potential of not having to take him back and forth to work but I completely forgot about the awesome aspect of having someone to run errands for me. WHAT a bonus! And as much as I love my sweet time alone with Cosy when I pick her up... by the time I take her home I'm usually absolutely wiped out. To get a break from THAT chore is awesome! And... also good for her to have time alone with her dad which is really, really rare.

Tomorrow I have a very important appointment that I'll talk more about when I blog in the morning! Hope you've had a great weekend. Tell me about your own empty nest moments... when that last little chick stopped needing you as much... love and hugs, y'all!

Friday, May 18, 2018

Questions And Answers...

I thought it might be fun to use a few questions I found on the internet as a writing prompt for blogging. I don't always wake up feeling creative with the words just pouring out. In fact, today I woke up quite sick from a migraine so my only thoughts were ... ugh. Fortunately, I had written this blog a few days ago. Hope you enjoy! I'd love to see your answers to the same questions!

1. If you had the opportunity to change one thing in your life, what would that be and why?

Just one thing? Can I make my one wish to wish for a thousand wishes? If not... I would wish to be really wealthy. Although my first thought is, "I'd like to be healthy and strong," I feel like having money gives you opportunities to improve things in your life. I would be able to have access to better doctors (no shade toward my current doctors intended there) and possibly find answers to some of my health challenges. I would be able to afford people to do some of the things that cause pain for me. I could afford someone - a chef, maybe, or even just one of those meal subscription services- to help me eat better and possibly lose weight which obviously would make life easier. My back needs less of a load to carry. Money could change some of the situations that bring me stress. I could make it so that Marvin doesn't have to work as much - or at all, up to him - and we could travel or... just hang out together more. I need a car in a bad way as the one I'm driving is difficult for me... it's hard to turn and I feel exhausted from driving it.. grateful to have it but you know, if I'm wishing... I would have the best mattresses to sleep on and massages and ... oh, I think I need an inversion table. It seems shallow to thing that money could change everything because, obviously, that's not true but it could make some things easier...

2. What do you find yourself thinking about the most?

I definitely can't make this just one subject. I think about Oliver and Cosette every single day... and my nephew Finn and his baby sister due later this year... and how much I want to love these babies the way that my mom would have loved them if she had the chance. I think about Marvin and how he's feeling... if it's a rough day for him emotionally or physically. I think about our relationship uh LOT... not in a "where is this going?" kind of way, not like you might think... I think about things we can do together, even as simple as where we might go to lunch this week. I think about how I can be a good partner for him and what would make him happy. I think about my kids and each individual relationship... not just my boys but also my girls... Ryan's fiance Sara and Cody's wife Marquee... and also Tasha, even though she and Austin aren't together, she's the mom of my granddaughter so I think about how she is doing. I think about my dad and his happiness... his health... and so forth. I think about my brothers and their families. My nieces and nephews are so precious to me and as they're getting older I get to communicate with them on a more adult level. It's quite a lovely bonus. Sarabeth has a blog you can click the link to see it (be kind if you comment) - it's amazing considering she's grown up on my blog. My nephew, Cory just recently got married and we've enjoyed a much closer relationship as he's gotten older. And of course, watching Jamie blossom as a performer has just been such a joy for me. I think about all these moving pieces to our family.  I still think a lot about my estranged brother and his family and how much I want them to return to the fold, so to speak.

But there's so much more... I think about my friends, in real life and people I know only (or mostly) online. When one of my online friends went through a hard time recently there were about a dozen ladies who rallied around her and prayed for her and encouraged her and just really cared on such a deep level. I realized how invested we are in each other's lives and how unique that is to our generation and the ones that follow because of the relationships we've been able to form online... and it made me want to nurture those relationships more. Whether friends or family... I think about whether or not I'm giving people enough love and support. But I also think about whether or not I'm being kind to myself, remembering my limitations and respecting my boundaries. I have a tendency to push myself too hard when I have the chance to be with others and then I end up feeling very isolated and lonely when I am in too much pain to keep up.

I also think about a lot of superficial stuff like the upcoming Royal Wedding and who will walk Meghan down the aisle if her father doesn't. I think about the political climate and racial issues and just all the hate there is in the world toward people who don't think like us or look like us or love like us. I think about what makeup colors I want to try and whether I have enough yogurt to get through to the next day when I feel like going to the store. I think about whether my meds are all filled and if they're working. When I talked about my schedule I talked about staying mentally busy and this is exactly what I mean... my brain is never quiet until the ambien kicks in at night and then, and only then, does my mind stop racing.

3. What are the things that bring you the greatest pleasure?

The things that bring me the greatest pleasure aren't things, they're people. It's weird because as an introvert I so greatly value the time alone to rest and recharge but I love the time I spend with the people I love. I love texting with people... and facetiming with Oliver... and the long talks Marvin and I have on the phone when we're apart. I LOVE being in my nest but I also love the nest I have at Marvin's and how safe and loved I feel there. I love every single minute with Oliver and Cosy although I am definitely worn out when they go home. I love hearing from friends (I love it more via text than on the phone, though... ) But I also love a good meal out... (or in)... going to concerts with my honey because it makes me feel so alive... I love traveling, even if it's not a major travel destination. Marvin and I took an overnight trip to this place in East Nowhere, Tennessee to handle some business he had. We did no sightseeing (there were no sights to see) ate in a really average BBQ place, spent the night in a basic hotel and it was just fun to have a change of scenery... although I am 100%  homebody and love to be in my nest. We had a really good time.

4. What is your biggest accomplishment in life?

Bringing my children into the world and helping my mom leave this world. It all took so much strength and courage and faith... and in all of those moments I felt so empowered and capable. Those events make me believe that I can do anything. I also feel like having the courage to wake up every day and keep going is a huge accomplishment. There are a lot of things that have happened to me that should have taken me out of the game... made me bitter and jaded... and I feel like the fact that I don't allow myself to feel defeated is a battle I win every single day.

5. Where are you most comfortable?

Two places: my nest at my house and my nest at Marvin's. They are the places I feel the most calm and relaxed, the places that I have the least amount of pain... they are the places that allow me to be my most authentic self and to take the time I need to introvert and recharge.

I would love you for you pick any or all of these questions and answer them! I know it's easier to comment on Facebook, rather than on the blog and that is perfectly fine. I think we all would draw strength from seeing each others answers and it's a really cathartic exercise to stop and think about these things. I've got more questions like this if you're interested in seeing my answers... let me know! Love and hugs, y'all!

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Throw Back Thursday - Blog Entries from May 17th

Just for the record, I'm total Yanny - until Marvin changed the pitch higher and then I heard Laurel. Honestly, I thought I had some kind of hearing loss... but anyways...

I thought it was so much fun looking back at old blog entries last week that I am going to do it again... let me know if you're looking back with me! Can you believe I did not post on this day in the past three years? But I have a nice long list prior to that if you'd like to venture back with me.

I wrote a nice long blog post on this day in 2014, giving a lot of detail about my life here and things I was doing. When I read it... it seemed like a lifetime ago but honestly, it was just four years.

On this day in 2013 I had officially stopped working for ... well, at least until now... and actually my disability just got extended by Social Security, I'll write a blog update at some point. I was juggling parenting Austin long distance and getting ready to make the move to the mountain house ... where I have lived happily ever after since.

In 2012 I was struggling to collect unemployment, wondering if I should go for disability instead (the short answer is no, that last attempt to work was immensely valuable in proving my disability case)... and feeling grateful for the things that were happening in my life.

May 17, 2011 had me learning to adjust to living with chronic pain... and dealing with chronic lack of child support. My life was one big logistical nightmare, balancing work with running a household and trying to handle my responsibilities when I was in terrible pain. I'm so grateful for disability (pay, not the actual disability) and having help around the house.

Apparently there was a time when I didn't work as hard to find Reasons to Love Monday. This post from 2010 just smacks of misery. Also... I'm eating those words about Obama taking the presidency seriously. Live and learn, chickadee.

May 17 was a Sunday back in 2009 and I churned out this literary gem... don't bother getting a snack first, it won't take long to read... Sunday, May 17, 2009

Tell me what makes this day special in your world!

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

What I'm Watching With My Fella

I have a lot of down time... a lot of "don't feel well enough to do anything except rest" time and that means I watch a lot of tv. Since I hang out with my fella on his "weekend" we also do a lot of tv watching together. I'm not exactly the kind of girl that he can go roller blading or mountain climbing with... so tv watching is our jam.

He discovered (and I realized) that I have missed out on a LOT of movie standards that most people of our generation have seen. I can only say that I have been single for most of my adult life and have been too busy raising kids and working to watch a lot of movies. Marvin has made it his mission to educate me on those movies / tv shows that he thinks I should have seen. Here are a few that we have watched together and my thoughts on them:

  • Silence of the Lambs  - glad to finally understand the references to this movie and there are SO MANY. It was suspenseful and interesting... but not my favorite movie ever, for sure.
  • Sling Blade  - worth watching just for the amazing voice that Billy Bob Thornton gives to his character. So many great, great lines in this movie! 
  • Pulp Fiction - not my favorite. I found it really confusing and Marvin had to sort of reconstruct it to help me understand. I would be embarrassed that I needed help but it's like all the times that my niece Jamie has had to explain Disney movies to me. Sometimes I just don't get it.
  • Shawshank Redemption - I love a movie that gives you closure. I felt like this was such a great story and I loved the ending.
  • About Time - this one had us both in tears, like, a pile of kleenexes stacked up between us tears. It's the sweetest story but I'm not going to give you the plot, I'm going to just say, go watch it! 
  • Safety Not Guaranteed - it was a bit science fiction, a bit chick flick. It had a really sweet story line and I think you would like it. 

He has also introduced me to several television shows that he enjoyed and we have watched them together... or I have watched them and discussed them with him. Those include:

  • Shameless (he was watching it in real time so I started at the beginning and binge watched until I caught up so we could watch new episodes together)
  • The Wire - this is sort of a police drama but it's a good story line and the actors are really amazing. 
  • Breaking Bad - Everyone knows what this one is about. I had sort of written it off but I'm glad I ended up watching it. It's one of those that makes you think. 
  • Better Call Saul - It's the prequel to Breaking Bad. I'm not caught up to current on this show because it isn't up to date on Netflix yet and that's where I've watched it but so far, I think it's as good as, maybe better than Breaking Bad. 

We just recently finished watching a show set in Post-Katrina New Orleans, Treme. We love the show for a lot of reasons... it includes the music that he loves - sort of a jazz / blues / R&B / second line / funk genre- and artists that he loves and I have come to love like the guy we saw in concert on New Year's Eve, Tab Benoit (pronounced Ben-wah).  Treme delves into a lot of the New Orleans traditions such as Mardi Gras and the Mardi Gras Indians - I could do a whole post on my fascination with the Mardi Gras Indians. It includes a lot of footage of New Orleans food. Treme gives you more of an inside look on life in Post Katrina New Orleans and although it is fictionalized, a lot of what they show is based on true stories and things that did happen. It's been such an enjoyable show. We watched it on Amazon Prime Video, I'm not sure where else you might find it but if you're looking for something to binge watch, Treme is a good 'un.

We have also discovered / enjoyed a number of programs together... some of my favorites have been:

  • Black Mirror (although, trust me, you need to watch this with someone because you're going to need to have a little debriefing, therapy, or discussion afterwards)
  • Big Mouth - it's animated and I'm not a fan of anything animated but this show is about puberty and it is HILARIOUS. Very honest and a bit graphic so, maybe don't watch it with kids, at least not little ones. 

Marvin is a huge... HYUUUUUJJJJJJ!... music fan. He's worked in radio for a long time, although he is currently at a sports talk radio station, he has worked for music stations in the past which exposed him to a lot of music that you might otherwise miss. He loves such a wide spectrum of music and he loves introducing me to things that he enjoys. He fixed up an iPod for me with over 3,000 songs... and he even included some of my favorite musical theater for my listening pleasure! Sometimes we fall down this rabbit hole of watching music videos, usually on YouTube and although I don't always love the music he shows me, I love his passion for music. I love seeing things that excite him and hearing the stories behind the music and learning what makes it special for him.

Speaking of YouTube... Marvin made the switch from cable to YouTube TV last fall. YouTube TV offers most of the channels he had on cable for a fraction of the price. The only thing they didn't have was the MLB (major league baseball) channel, which my guy watches every night to fall asleep during baseball season. They finally added MLB network this Spring and he was all set! At my house we still have satellite tv but honestly, it is so rare for me to watch broadcast channels in real time. Mostly I watch Netflix or Amazon Prime or YouTube. On the odd occasion I watch broadcast tv, it's usually something I've recorded. I think I could easily live without satellite and I wonder how far away we are from doing away with that kind of programming altogether. It's as outdated as land-line phones now. Not an ad for YouTube TV but I think it's worth checking out if you're trying to spend a little less money on  your tv viewing.

I'm interested in knowing what you're watching... especially what you watch with your significant other. Leave a comment here or back on my Facebook post about this blog entry! Love and hugs, y'all!

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Update on Cosette and Oliver

When I was a kid I thought of grandparents as the "little old lady" and "little old man" although, to be honest, I had one older grandma who was probably more traditional and one younger grandmother who is still living at the ripe, young age of 94. Now we live in an age where Granny is more likely to be called Mimi or Missy and ... things are just different.

My "babies" (as I still refer to them) are 3 and almost 3. Cosette just turned 3 on April 29 and Oliver will be 3 in July. I see Cosy a couple of times a week and I see Oliver once or twice a month. I talk to Oliver on Facetime once or twice a week so... we're in close contact, even if I don't see him as often as Cosette.

Because Cosette's parents have sort of a fluid, make it up as we go along, joint-ish custody arrangement, and because Cosette's dad lives here with me and doesn't yet drive, I have more responsibility for Cosette than I do for Oliver. I do a lot more actual parenting of Cosette where with Oliver I have more of a traditional Grandma relationship. Things with Cosette's mom are currently pretty good. We have had struggles in the past and when things are going well, I am relieved and appreciative and NEVER take it for granted. It's been a lot of emotional, frustrating work to get to this point. Cosy is shy and introverted and can be a bit more clingy than Oliver... who is a free spirit and (at least for me) rolls with the punches. Cosy though, is my girl. She loves watching me do my hair and makeup. She loves dresses and tights and hair bows (finally). She hangs out in the bathroom with me while I take my shower, watching videos on YouTube and chatting with me. We love to go to Dunkin Donuts and get "pink" donuts for her and coffee.

Cosy is still very attached to her pacifier, although we are trying to substitute chewing gum instead. She is no longer addicted to Frozen. Minnie Mouse is her ride or die chick now. She loves animals and flowers and her daddy. She is happiest when she's outside working with her dad in the yard. She is also a mommy's girl. If we've been gone for awhile she will ask to go to mommy's house (and whenever it's practical, I will take her home... I want her to feel that I support her relationship with both of her parents, they are both important). She is a girly girl who likes having her fingernails painted (by her dad, of course) and loves to watch me put on makeup and fix my hair. She loves anything pink or sparkly.

Potty training with Cosy has been... complicated. She goes through spells where she goes potty for me like a champ and other times she screams bloody murder if I try to sit her on the potty. I would say she is mostly in big girl undies when she's with me during the day but is one hundred percent in pullups at night and about 90% in pullups when we leave the house. She hates diapers and pullups and wants to wear "Minnie Mouse undies" all the time when she's with me but... she can be sketchy about cooperating going potty.

Despite the additional work involved with getting her to go potty... I absolutely love the time we spend together while she's on the potty. I have a little stool I sit on in front of her and we talk while we are waiting for something to happen. I have been taking her to the potty with me since she was a year and a half so... I'm used to her company in the bathroom. My latest trick with her is to suggest that she try to "toot" while she's on the potty. It seems to get her to relax more and engage the right muscles to get the teetee out too. And as my honey always says, "farts are just funny".

Oliver is ALL BOY! He is funny and likes to make people laugh. He loves sports (just like his dad) and Mickey Mouse and superheroes. He loves the Toy Story characters, Buzz Lightyear and Woody. He will say, "to uh-finity and beyond!" like Buzz does. He likes to run and climb and has never met a stranger. He sometimes gives his mom a hard time and he cries when it's time to leave my house (which breaks my heart). He has infinite patience for Cosy who can tend to have a harder time sharing toys (because she's used to being alone with me) and who doesn't like hugs (the whole introvert thing). He has the most gorgeous, long curly hair that his parents haven't been able to bear cutting. One day, eventually. Right now it's sort of his trademark although I do with him the same thing I do with Cosy which is, immediately pull it back out of his face so that he can play without hair in his eyes. He is started to go potty... they use a combination of English and Spanish with him so instead of "undies" like Cosy wears, he wears "chonies". He will also tell you body parts in Spanish and English and sometimes instead of "I love you" he says, "Te amo" which... melts MY HEART!

I knew that I would love being a grandmother but I was completely unprepared for how intensely I would love these tiny humans. I can not imagine a world where I don't see them as often or where I might not get to talk to them as much. They are my people... my reward for putting up with their dads... and they bring so much joy into my life. It breaks my heart that they will probably not remember my mom because she loved them so very much and every milestone with them is bittersweet because she's not here to share it. I just try to love them like she would and I just hope I'm even half the grandma that she was.

Tell me about your grandkids (if you have them)... your favorite things to do together and your experiences with potty training! Love and hugs, y'all!

Monday, May 14, 2018

Reasons To Love Monday

I have a headache. That's the only thing I can think of to say this morning. I'm out of advil and I have a headache that is not yet a migraine but it has migraine potential. That being said... there are still reasons to love today and I'm going to dig deep to find a few to share...

1. Austin brought me a vase of roses cut from the yard this morning. My mom's roses seem to be even more beautiful than ever this year and it's a lovely legacy of her. Having a little vase of them in my room is precious and what a great way to start the day! And seriously... how thoughtful of Austin?

2. Other than the Austin transportation responsibilities today, I have absolutely zero/nada/nothing on my agenda today. That was sort of what yesterday was like, too and I don't feel the least bit guilty for it. I had to get over the guilt about the amount of rest my body needs a long time ago. I need more rest because I live with more pain... it's that simple. I am going to bask in the luxury of it today.

3. I freaking love my Amazon Firestick. It is, without a doubt, the best purchase I've made all year. Once the smart part quit working on my tv, I had to hook my laptop up to watch any of my internet based viewing... Netflix, Amazon Prime, etc. To be able to just chill in my nest and watch whatever I want by clicking my little remote... well, I feel like the Queen of Sheba. Wherever Sheba is.

4. We are only five days away from the Royal Wedding! You may remember that I took the day off when Prince William married Kate. I'm THAT into the whole Royal Wedding extravaganza. It's like I told my guy last night... it would be like... if the World Series only happened maybe 4 times in your whole lifetime. How many Royal Weddings do we get to see in our lives? SOOOOO few! I'm going to soak it all up and not be the least bit embarrassed that I'm an American who is nowhere near royalty and this wedding has zero to do with my life. I just love the pageantry and majesty of it all. And what an amazing fairy tale - an American woman marries a Prince... could it get any better?

5. Tomorrow I get to see two of my favorite people in the world - Cosy and Marvin! So today when it's just me and the cat and the dog all day... I know that I can look forward to lots of cuddles and kisses tomorrow! And Cosy might hug me too.... *wink*

6. There's another Mother's Day gift coming from Cody and Marquee and Oliver. One came on Saturday but would you believe a spider got into the box... and when I opened the package that durn spider liked to scare me to death! Cody promises that he did not order the spider. Teehee. And part two is on the way today or tomorrow.

7. I did laundry yesterday - or rather Austin did my laundry yesterday - so I don't have to bother with that today or tomorrow. I've got plenty of clean clothes to last me for a week or so.

8. Austin watched The Greatest Showman this past week and loves it so we are enjoying listening to it in the car. My sweetie fixed up an iPod for me with lots of stuff I love... including The Greatest Showman... so Austin and I had a blast blasting it on his way to work this morning.

All in all, despite the headache and a few aches and pains... this Monday is not such a bad deal. I think I might be able to love it....

Let me know why you're loving Monday this week! Love and hugs, y'all!

Sunday, May 13, 2018

My Weekly Schedule -

It's been a long time since I've talked about what I do with my time. As you probably know, I've been on Disability since May of 2013. I haven't worked in FIVE YEARS! It took a bit longer to get Social Security Disability approved but even that has been nearly three years. Actually, it's time for Social Security to review my case... but I got a notice recently that they were not going to review me at this time. They're satisfied, I guess, that I'm still unable to work and I think that's a fair assessment. It would be impossible for me to consistently go to a job several times a week. My back pain is worse than it was when I was approved and my migraines are much more frequent. I would be a lousy employee. 

I DO stay busy in my own way which is... mentally active but physically I have to be very careful if I want to be able to keep my pain manageable. I generally find if I have a busy day then the next day or two I'm going to feel pretty lousy. Austin still doesn't drive (anyone want to teach him? Please? It's so hard for me!) so I am still responsible for his transportation to work... I am still responsible for picking Cosy up and taking her home when we have her most of the time, although Tasha's parents have been good to get her back and forth when I'm not at home. 

A normal week usually looks like this for me...

  • Monday - take Austin to work, pick Austin up from work... take him to the bank if it's payday but otherwise it's usually a quiet day for me. I watch a lot of stuff on Netflix, Amazon Prime, etc. I play games on my phone. I love watching Instagram stories. I watch stuff on YouTube. I study my Italian... those things are true for most days when I'm home... and true in smaller amounts when I'm at my sweetie's house. 
  • Tuesday - pick Cosy up whenever she wakes up, run errands like grocery shopping, picking up prescriptions, get gas, do laundry, take Cosy home... pack and then go to Marvin's house in time for his softball game. I refer to Tuesday as date night although I'm there longer than just Tuesday night. For dinner we usually will go to Twisted Taco either by ourselves or with his softball buddies. Tuesday is a long day for me and I'm usually wiped out by the time softball is over. Sometimes we will watch tv together after softball but most of the time I'm just ready to go to sleep so he watches sports while I fall asleep.  
  • Wednesday - Marvin and I usually sleep as late as we can and then watch a lot of tv. We go out for lunch and sometimes do a little shopping then come back and review his questions for trivia that night. I always love going over the trivia questions with him... I'm really, really bad at it so it's more fun for me if I ask him the questions but it's faster for him to ask me (or just read over them) so he can get them in the order he wants to ask them. If there's time we will watch tv or sometimes we just play on our phones or listen to music until time for him to leave for work. Once he leaves I commence spa night and soak in the tub / do face masks / shave my legs... all the girly maintenance stuff that I don't manage to do when I shower at home because Cosy usually hangs out in the bathroom with me while I shower. On Wednesday nights he gets home fairly early so we will usually watch an episode or two of whatever series we're binging on at the time. It's a late night for me but I will have slept late that morning and I will sleep late the next morning so it's ok. 
  • Thursday - is another day to sleep in unless we have chores / errands to run / things to do / people to see. Depending on what he's got on his agenda we might go out for lunch or sometimes we cook at home. I usually go home mid/late afternoon. It makes me a little sad to go home BUT... I'm always happy to be at home, if that makes sense. I could probably do a whole blog post on this. I love being away from home for a little bit every week. It's good to have a break from the responsibilities, it's a healthy thing for me mentally to not be at home ALL the time, especially since I don't work. But I love my nest. I love my own space. I love not being underfoot at Marvin's and not having to be dependent on him to entertain me all the time... which wouldn't work at all be because he works SO much! I love being around for my dad and the needy little dog. I love being close enough to Cosy to see her often. Home is good. What we're doing works for us at this point... so on Thursday I go home. Not gonna lie... sometimes I'm a little tearful on the way home... but just because I know it's going to be several days until I see him again. 
  • Friday - I take Austin to work and pick him up from work. Friday looks a lot like Monday but I'm usually a bit more ragged on Friday and less likely to do anything beyond taking Austin back and forth. Sometimes I'll pick up groceries or run little errands here and there but mostly... I rest up from the activity of the past few days. 
  • Saturday - Often on Saturday I will pick Cosy up when she wakes up and let her spend the morning with me, especially if it's a Saturday that Oliver is coming up, which happens about once a month. Cosy HATES that we take her dad to work on Saturday. She gets really depressed when he gets out of the car because she LOVES her daddy. I try to cheer her up by doing something special for just the two of us like going to get donuts or playing in Nana's makeup... going to Starbucks... whatever. The main thing is that I like having a couple of hours where it's just Nana and Cosy... or where it's Nana and Cosy and Oliver. These are important relationships for her and also... she lives with her other grandparents and they need a break every now and then. She is really cooperative with me but still... between in and out of the car seat, on and off the potty, etc, it's rough on my back so I don't usually keep her much past lunch time. Sometimes on Saturday if my dad isn't golfing he will pick Austin up from work so whenever Cosy goes home, I can rest. 
  • Sunday - is a true day of rest for me. Friday night, Saturdays and Sundays I talk to Marvin on the phone several times a day. Monday / Tuesday / Friday during the day he's at the radio station and we can't really talk. When he's doing trivia we obviously can't really talk, although I do usually talk to him on his way to trivia every night. But when he's delivering pizza... we talk A LOT. I'm usually watching tv / playing games and talking with him on the phone like we're a couple of teenagers. Sometimes Cosy with us on Sunday since Austin is off but usually he has her Tuesday / Thursday and likes to have Sunday to do chores around the house. Most Sundays for me are lay in bed / talk on the phone days. 
And then I go to bed and wake up and do it all again the next week. Every week isn't absolutely identical but I'm a creature of habit and do tend to live life in the same rhythm every week. There are doctors appointments and various other things that happen along the way but for the most part, this is my week. I sleep later now than I used to... most days I'm asleep until 7am. I generally am getting ready to go to sleep around 9pm. I play this online trivia game - HQ - on the phone with Marvin and then I usually am ready to go to sleep when it ends, around 9:15. It may take me a half hour to wind down but it's rare that I'm not asleep by ten. Would my life bore you to tears? I feel like I'm always mentally busy, even juggling several things at once but I rest an awful lot. If you have any questions about what I do... how things are going in my life, feel free to ask... 

Hope you had a good Mother's Day. Mine was exactly what I wanted - quiet. I heard from all my kids but I didn't really "celebrate" so to speak. It's what I needed. Anyways... thanks for reading... love and hugs!