Mawmaw's In The Hospital - Five Generation Photo

These girls! Aren't they  gorgeous? 

I could have sworn I blogged this before... but I guess I just put it on Facebook. My mom went into the ER early Friday morning in horrible pain. They admitted her for pain management around midday Friday. They did some tests and determined that in addition to the pancreatic tumor (which we have named Pat, I'll explain more about that later) she has several stomach ulcers. They have her NPO (nothing per oral) and are trying to get the inflammation of her pancreas under control and keep her comfortable before they start trying to let her drink and eat. It's Sunday as I'm typing this and she is still NPO... they increased her pain meds again today... and it will be a few days before she is able to come home. The surgery to remove Pat has still not been scheduled as they have to get the inflammation under control first, I think, if I understood correctly.

In my last post I posted some information from cancer.gov and shared my suspicion that Pat is a gastrinoma - a tumor in the cells that make gastrin. The discovery of stomach ulcers increases my suspicion. Gastrinomas make the stomach produce too much acid.... too much acid causes ulcers so... I may not have more than a Google degree but it helps me when I can sort out a logical reason why these things are happening from a scientific standpoint. From a spiritual standpoint I am completely confident that God is in control. His timing is perfect, his power is infinite, his love is unconditional and I completely trust Him to put mom where she needs to be to work out His will in her life and ours.

Cosette is fascinated with Sarabeth and Jamie

I always blog from the standpoint of sharing my life experiences because it helps me connect with others who have gone through or will go through the same thing at some point so please don't think me selfish when I blog about how Pat (mom's tumor) affects my life. The main thing... I miss my mom so much! She's the one I confide in... the one who understands my illnesses and disabilities... the one who makes sure I'm ok. She is where she needs to be because she has suffered so much since this illness started. I want her to be where she can be comfortable from a pain management standpoint but I miss having her here and lucid. Nobody else in my life understands what it's like to live with chronic pain. Nobody else loves my kids and grandkids as much as I do. My dad is awesome, compassionate, caring, generous and all of that but he handles pain in a different way (bulldozes past it). There are other people in my life who love me and keep in touch with me but it's just different from mom.

Cheesing with Jamie after school last week

Another way life is out of whack right now is like my bolognas first name... O-S-C-A-R. He is the neediest little dog on Earth and he has designated me his Mawmaw substitute and has been glued to me from the minute mom left for the ER Friday morning. I don't mind... not one bit... I mean, we all have certain talents and abilities and cuddling up with an animal is something I'm perfectly equipped to do. I've graduated from my usual nest of my pepto bismol pink recliner to my sofa and big comfy ottoman so that there's room for Oscar to be beside me and not on top of me. Pop's been splitting his time between the hospital and church - this weekend they're doing their Christmas musical performance - but even when Pop's home Oscar has preferred to be with me. He slept with Pop some Friday night but I had left the door to the Whine Cellar open in case he wanted to go back and forth between us and he did. Any time Pop got up for anything Oscar came racing down to me. I think last night Oscar stayed with me the entire night.

Yesterday my Aunt Clair brought my little Grandma up to see the musical program. My cousin Michelle and her daughter Mackenzie came along and stopped by the house to visit a little while before the show. Oscar acted like a depraved beast, barking and growling and acting like he was going to chew them up and spit them out.  Not easy to handle him when he's like that! Austin worked until five so I picked him up and we went to the church to have a Five Generation photo with Grandma right before the musical started. I didn't attempt to go to the musical because last year I went and I was miserable for days afterwards. Plus the whole "not leaving Oscar" thing. We made it to North Georgia BBQ right before they closed and got ribs and fries for a mini-feast. Driving home in the dark was like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. I've got to get to the eye doctor!

(I think I'm going to have to invest in a new camera. Things seem a bit smudgy.)

My recovery from Dental Trauma Part Two has been better than the first go-round but the past day or two the pain has gotten worse and chewing is pure misery. I have no idea why I thought ribs would be good under the circumstances but I just suffered through because... ribs. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow to get the stitches out. Mom drove me last time so I wasn't trying to drive while dealing with pain but this time I'm gonna have to tough it out. I think I can handle it ok. It's fewer stitches this time.

Anyways... I'm getting pretty dizzy so I'm going to wrap up this update. Please keep Mawmaw in your thoughts and prayers. We need her healthy and happy! And pray that we get rid of Pat very, very soon! Oh, about that... Austin has a friend named Pat that gets on my nerves. Every time we talk about getting rid of Pat it makes me snicker. You just gotta find those little nuggets of fun in times like these! Hope you're all having a lovely weekend. I'll update again whenever anything changes. Thanks for your love and encouragement! Love and hugs!

Notice how Cosette keeps her tiny hand on Grandma's shoulder? It was so sweet!