Whiny Wednesday

Trying on a new little dress  - I think it's adorable! 

Yesterday was waaaay more stressful than it had to be but... that's just par for the course, I guess when thinks are out of sorts. I have a little update on my mom from yesterday afternoon but I haven't talked to her yet today and I haven't talked to Pop other than exchanging necessary info regarding doggie bowel movements when he brought me down some breakfast.

Pop talked to a girl from the surgeon's office yesterday afternoon and she had no idea that mom was in the hospital. They had scheduled her appointment with the surgeon for January 8th (I'm eye-rolling violently with this), like I said, not realizing that mom has been hospitalized since Friday and diagnosed with ulcers on Saturday. I was eavesdropping (not being nosy, it's just easier than Pop having to repeat things over and over again) from the Whine Cellar and Pop was upstairs but the girl told Pop that once mom gets out of the hospital if/when she has another pain episode to just take her to Emory in Midtown and have her go through their ER, listing the surgeon as her treating physician. This was a huge relief because we've all had sort of a "what next?" stress about it all. Mom did eat yesterday, soft foods, and they found that her potassium and magnesium were low, not surprising. Like I said, I have no new info from this morning. The girl from the surgeon's office was going to check in with him to see if plans needed to change since mom is in the hospital and having other complications from Pat (the pancreatic tumor).

Now about me... I had a rough day yesterday and a rough night last night. Austin worked really hard at tidying up the house since he was off work yesterday. Part of the idea behind he and Tasha living here was that me, Mawmaw and Pop need a hand with things. There's a lot I can't do and a lot that Mawmaw and Pop shouldn't do. Of course we had no idea that within the first week of them living here Mawmaw would end up in the hospital so there was a lot more that we needed everyone to help with than we expected. There are things that are uncomfortable for me to do that I just go ahead and do (like cleaning the litter boxes) because it hurts but I CAN do it. Then there are things that I absolutely can't do because it would drop me in my tracks to do so - like vacuuming or lifting heavy things. Some of the things I CAN do (like emptying the dishwasher or even, for that matter, climbing stairs), I can do but I can't do repetitively. It can be very frustrating and overwhelming for me when there are things to be done that I can't do - or that I can't do well - or that I can't do consistently. Mom being in the hospital feels very much like a glimpse of my future. I have a lot of anxiety about what happens to me when I'm older and less able and my parents aren't around any more. For the most part I don't allow myself to dwell on those things but it's been impossible not to think about those things lately. Austin did a lot to help yesterday but it did put strain on him because he had other things besides helping out around here that he needed to tend to. I hate for him to be overwhelmed like that. Seriously, he works hard and he never misses work and he needs to be able to rest some on his days off. Just as my parents hate for me to be overwhelmed like I was on Monday, I hate for Austin to be overwhelmed. You hear a cancer diagnosis and you think about the medical implications and impact on your family but there are so many things that you aren't / can't be prepared for. This week has been like that.

Anyways. Oscar and Pop spent the afternoon and evening together which was nice. Pop took him to Lowe's with him and they worked in the yard some and I had a little break from his needy little self (Oscar's needy little self, not Pop's, in case that wasn't clear). By bedtime I was missing my little buddy (Oscar, not Pop, although I do miss Pop too sometimes). I fell asleep early and around 11pm Oscar came down and let me know he needed to go potty so I turned on the big flood lights outside and took him out. It's very, very dark here at night and there are lots of creatures that roam around that might see Oscar as a nice little snack. Fortunately he was quick about his business and went back upstairs to Pop for awhile. I went back to sleep and then Oscar came back down to be with me around 1:30am. I woke up and realized that lots of parts of me were hurting... it happens... it was the jaw (where the packing in my dry socket had come out) and my knees and shoulders were aching and my lower back and I just couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep. Then Little Kitty (who is having his own issues since all my attention is going to the dog and not to him) kept picking fights with the other cats. Honestly, I think he is just a little rascal and isn't being aggressive. He's like an annoying little brother. I got up several times and fussed at him. Then he somehow figured out how to open Oscar's container of food that I have downstairs so I don't have to go upstairs to feed him. So my achy breaky self was up at dark-thirty picking up Oscar's high dollar dog food one little smelly piece of kibble at a time. Fortunately Oscar slept through that because he is very possessive of his food and would have had himself a snack of a Little Kitty if he had known! I couldn't get back to sleep after that so I played a couple dozen games of sudoku on my phone and watched an old movie - An Apartment For Peggy - that I had recorded last week and finally got back to sleep around 6am.

Today I'm hoping to get some laundry done. I need to carry my dirty dishes upstairs and deal with whatever stage the dishwasher is in. I need to have something substantial to eat because the last decent meal I had was the leftover Chinese food on Monday. Yesterday I mostly snacked. I also need to get some Christmas wrapping taken care of and get a box ready to ship to my brother. Mom brought stuff down the day before she got sick with the intention of wrapping and boxing it up but she never got the chance to do it.  There are a few errands I need to run but I'll do those tomorrow when I go back to the dentist.

And... I guess that's all I have to share for now. For friends/family who are checking in for updates on Mawmaw, I'll try to update if anything changes with her. Hope you all have a non-whiny Wednesday!