curly, rainy, jeans kind of day

We have a cold rain predicted for all day.... fortunately it's a jeans day at work... and I'll be curly today because... well, it's raining, I don't have a choice. That all translates into low maintenance grooming this morning.

I didn't sleep well last night. I had the opportunity to go to sleep early and instead I stayed up reading blogs and such. On the blog, "Bring the Rain" there was a post about/from/by women who had lost babies. I read hundreds of comments to it... people sharing their grief... some of them babies who were lost 50 years ago... some of them women who had lost their children due to abortion... their stories are so compelling. I've never lost a child. I never even had to suffer infertility. For me it just took a lustful glance and I was pregnant. If I hadn't had my tubes tied in 1995 I'd probably be giving Michelle Dugger a good run for her money. I've never felt that kind of pain but it was interesting to read and see how women handled this devastating pain. Some had blogs - and I would take a few minutes to read their stories - and some just left an anonymous sentence indicating that they had suffered loss. If you want to check this out... here's the link: http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/

I've become intensely interested in how women, specifically Christian women, handle disappointment. As I've said many times... my situation may not even begin to compare to the grief of losing a child... yet, it's my worst thing. I'm interested in how Godly women deal with their worst thing... death, illness, disappointment, suffering... I am drawn to those stories... not that I have become pessimistic or addicted to drama and sadness... but because I find incredible inspiration in those examples of survival.

There's a story in the Old Testament that isn't one of your "popular" standard stories that kids grow up learning in Sunday School but I think it's a really cool story. There were some Israelite children that were held captive in a foreign land and the King of that nation created an idol and insisted that everyone worship his idol or else they'd be thrown into a fiery furnace. The Israelites refused... and they were thrown in the furnace... and God was WITH them in the furnace... and the furnace did not burn them... and the King began to worship their God.

I won't post the whole passage here... it takes place in the 3rd chapter of Daniel - if you want a little more background, start at the beginning of Daniel and read through this chapter. If you don't have a bible handy, you can just go to http://www.biblegateway.com/ and search for the passage. The key verse for me is this: in verse 27 the three Israelite boys are ordered to come OUT of the furnace since it is obviously not serving the purpose the king had intended... they came out and all the government officials checked them out and "they saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their robes were not scorched and there was no smell of fire on them".

*laugh* So... my prayer is this... that I will walk through the fire and not be harmed. The world expects to look at me and find me burned, and broken and turned into a heap of ashes and... by the Grace of God... I will not be consumed. I will live a victorious life instead of... or maybe because of... the fire.

Lamentations 4:22-23 says "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "

Have a beautiful day... whether you walk in rain or fire or pain... my prayer is that you are not consumed. Hugs!