newsday Tuesday

Oh, the weather outside is frightful...

We're expecting snow today. Not the kind of snow that makes our untreated roads skating rinks... just pretty, non-accumulatin' kind of snow. I'm sort of excited about it. The accumulatin' is supposed to happen above 2500 feet elevation. I think we're at 3000 feet but Austin (who obsesses over my GPS) says we're around 2400. Either way, it will fall and be pretty.

I'm still recovering from yesterday. We're now an office of six: Duane plus five agents in various stages of licensing and staff agreements. Yesterday we were D plus two... myself (who wasn't feeling one hundred percent, as usual) plus a licensed agent who is new to us and not fully State Farm trained and appointed. There is a lot she can't do yet. It was a taxing day. I took a short lunch and just kept going.

I went home from work - it's dark now on my way home - and crashed. Austin had leftover turkey and this chicken flavored rice a roni type stuff that he cooked in the rice cooker.

We really do use our rice cooker a lot.

My appetite is ... weird. I can't eat much. I had a baked sweet potato for breakfast, two mcdonalds hamburger's (the kid sized) for lunch... a plate of rice and a bowl of raisin bran for dinner. I've been eating like that a lot lately. I can handle about a 1/2 cup to a 1 cup of food and after that I'm in pain. Even with the burgers for lunch I had wicked heartburn all afternoon and could have thrown up a couple of times. I pushed through it. I was the only one who could do the bank deposit. I had to stay. I didn't let on how miserable I was. I even walked out into the rain to the mailbox to check the mail... last week, after I mentioned the trouble I was having walking, a sweet co-worker volunteered to do it. It almost made me cry. Compassion does that for me. She wasn't there yesterday and I didn't want to humble myself again having to ask for help.

My belly hurts this morning and I haven't eaten anything at all. I have had a cup of coffee.I'd be more worried about the belly-aching if I wasn't already scheduled for a colonoscopy on the 20th.

I'm afraid our friend Herman Cain is done. I think you just about have to be a narcissist to believe you can be President of the United States. It requires a huge sense of self confidence. Very few humble men become great leaders... that's a shame... because they would make better leaders. There's no limit to what you can accomplish if you don't care who gets the credit. (that's not my quote but I heard it somewhere and really believe it). I think most men in leadership position have - at some point or to some level - have done something questionable in the way of abusing their power. I learned - in a very difficult way - that narcissists believe that they live by a separate set of rules than the rest of the world. At any rate... if Herman Cain were a liberal, he would be electable no matter what. The conservative base of the Republican Party isn't going to support someone of questionable moral character. No matter how wise he may be. And I'm less convinced of his wisdom. Bill Clinton and his bimbo eruptions were acceptable because he was a liberal. He may have been a decent leader but for me, he'll always be an unfaithful husband. Men who cheat on their wives will cheat on anything. Just my experience.

What our country needs is a humble, man of God who will seek God's guidance for this country. And that kind of man could never be elected these days because people are too afraid to bring an evangelical Christian into office. People are afraid of losing their "right to choose" or are afraid of losing the separation of  church and state. The thing is... our founding fathers wanted a freedom from a state mandated religion, not an absence of religion. When you take anything outside of God's will, you introduce a limitless number of frustrating conflicts and confusion. When you keep something within God's will, you find supernatural abundance of peace and perfection. That's just been my experience.

In other news... Trouble has started sleeping with his head on the pillow beside me. He kind of curls around the end of the pillow and lays his head on it. He pats me on the cheek to wake me up. It's the sweetest thing. Not so sweet was the fact that he just drank out of my coffee mug. Ugh. He's rotten.

Austin's going to want me to drive him to school again today and it ain't happening.

The neighbors upstairs are continuing to have trouble with their daughter. The fighting got pretty loud on Sunday. I felt so bad for them - all of them. It's so hard when you feel estranged from your children... thats a real heartache. I've been praying for peace for them. The police came Sunday night.

And... I guess that's about all the news for today... hope you all have a beautiful day and that you feel love, joy, peace... all the good things. Love and hugs.