My Favorite Things - Couch Potato Version

As you all know... I don't get out much. I try to make a point of having a "field trip" every day, just to break the monotony and keep (what's left of) my sanity but for the most part, I'm home. And if I'm home, no matter what time of the day, I always have my tv on. Old Faithful... the big, clunky, twenty year old monstrosity that I inherited from the Darby Days. I got a kitchen table, my cast iron skillet and a tv out of that divorce... guess which I use more?

My days are filled with electronic entertainment... tv, internet... that's my life. (Notice that I didn't include the phone in that line up? I really do very much hate the phone.) I thought I'd share a few of my favorite electronic escapes with you... and I'd love to hear what you're connected to as well.

1. How I Met Your Mother - It's in syndication so there are at least six episodes on each day. I love Neil Patrick Harris. I love the writing on the show, the continuation of running jokes throughout the series... I love the interaction between the ensemble and the almost over the top - almost too ridiculous to be true - but still believable situations in this sit-com. Love.

2. Fashion Police - Despite the fact that my wardrobe right now is mainly clothes that transition well from night to day - it's not so much that I stay in my pajamas during the day, I just wear clothes that are comfortable enough to sleep in. I consider it my effort to reduce my carbon footprint. (Just kidding. I'm not eco-friendly, I'm laundry lazy) despite the fact that I'm not exactly dressing in couture ... I love seeing people sitting around being catty about what other people are wearing. I don't care how fake and plastic Joan Rivers looks -she. cracks. me. UP!

3. In Session - I watch all six hours of In Session every weekday. I may flip around to other shows during that time but I can't miss In Session. In the brief minutes of my Unemployment Appeal Hearing last week, I found myself following the instructions that I've heard given to the Jury in the dozens of cases I've watched over the past year. "Don't nod your head, if your answer is yes, say yes, not uh-huh or yeah. Speak clearly and plainly". It's great practice for any future legal proceedings and Vinnie Politan is such a cutie!

4. Who Do You Think You Are / Finding My Roots - The first one is on Friday nights at 8pm, the second is on Sunday night. They are the same basic premise - taking a famous person and tracing back their genealogy via one branch of their family tree. Last night they took Rashida Jones (from The Office and Parks and Recreation) and traced back her mother's line via her Jewish grandmother. They were able to go back to her six times great-grandfather in Latvia to when the famiily first began using surnames. Sadly, they also found where the majority of her distant cousins were exterminated in the Holocaust. I enjoy these shows so much that I don't flip channels during commercials because I don't want to miss anything.

Side note - I'm a channel flipper. I very rarely watch *just one show* at a time. I usually have 2-3 shows at a time going in order to avoid commercials. I hate. HATE commercials!

5. The Waltons - when I was a little girl and my grandfather was sick with cancer, I spent a good deal of time with my grandparents (mama's parents) in their little apartment. I was allowed to watch three shows: The Waltons, Little House on the Prairie and The Billy Graham Crusade. Other than that... the tv was never on. It was partially a matter of not having unwholesome programs on... and partly because it was a very, very old tv and grandma knew she would never replace it.

Funny story - and side note number two - we went on a picnic at a state park with Grandma - it had to be prior to 1990 because we only had one kid at the time. There was a pool area and it was Summer so there were quite a few people wandering around in bathing suits. Traffic was moving very slowly due to the large number of swimsuit clad pedestrians and we got stuck behind a girl in a thong bikini. I mean... this girl was so scantily clad that I was embarrassed by her near nudity. I glanced into the rear view mirror to see what my conservative Grandmother's reaction was and she caught my glance. She said, "and women wonder why they get raped." Ha! I mean, obviously I don't condone rape, even if a woman is practically standing nekkid in front of you. But you have to see Grandma's point - if you put a big coconut cake on a table, slice it up and hold out a piece in front of me, I might reach for a fork. That's all. Anyways.

6. House Hunters / House Hunters International - I love house hunting. Back when I was a young newlywed and we couldn't afford so much as a pot to cook in, Robert and I used to go to subdivisions that were under construction and check out the model homes. It was one of those little excursions that led us to buying our first home in 1989. The House Hunters franchise is fun to me because it combines house hunting with information about the various geographical locations where the family is moving. I learn more about geography from House Hunters than I have from the National Geographic channel (which I also love).

7. Welcome to Sweetie Pie's - How much do I love Miss Robbie? I'm not much of a fried chicken eater (can't stand the bones) but every week when I watch their show, I want a big ole chicken breast and a side order of greens. I love the spirit of this family, the way that Miss Robbie has reinvented herself several times over the course of her life to be able to provide for her family. Love, love LOVE this show!

8. Parking Wars - Or, as I like to call it, "People who think they are above the law get SCHOOLED!". I generally do not wish ill toward other people. Really. I'm a kind and loving person. But these folks who park wherever the heck they wanna park and then want to get all bowed up toward the poor $9 an hour (I have no idea what they actually make) parking enforcement employee because they got in trouble for doing what they weren't supposed to do - it cracks me up! Favorite character: Garfield. He's just a cartoon character in my book. Incidentally (side note #3)... at the dentist office last week the obnoxious UPS guy had taken up all three handicapped parking places to drop off his package. The parking lot was LITERALLY EMPTY as it was right before the office reopened after lunch. He could have parked anywhere. If I had my camera with me I would have taken a picture to send to UPS. It's rude and selfish. AND... it wasn't even closest to where he needed to enter the building and he knew this because he completely bypassed the front door and went to a side door that I didn't even know existed.

9. The Five - If you aren't watching this show, you have to check it out. It features Greg Gutfeld, a libertarian author and complete nutjob, Dana Perino, former press secretary to George Bush who is a super smart and sweet little blonde girl from Wyoming, Eric Boling - grew up on the wrong side of the tracks in Chicago, went pro in baseball and transitioned to brilliant stockbroker and then parlayed that into a media career, Bob Beckel, old cokehead and alcoholic who worked on Jimmy Carter's campaign for President, a die-hard liberal but complete softy, Kimberly Guilfoyle who looks to me like a younger Idina Menzel - former wife of the Mayor of San Francisco, lawyer and token babe... Andrea Tantaros, another token attorney babe of Greek descent (her parents own a Greek restaurant) and Juan Williams who bores me to death. Every weekday at five pm, five of these people sit around a table and discuss current events. It's hilarious, entertaining and informative and Austin isn't allowed to speak to me when it's on.

10. Castleville - I gave up all the other internet games I was playing because I realized what a time thief they are and honestly... I was getting stressed trying to keep up. Castleville is the only one I play and I play it often. I'm a gamer, y'all.

11. The Daily Mail online. Yes. It's from the U.K. Yes. It's a gossip website. There are some stories that I'm afraid to click on out of fear that I'll break some law and my internet history will be held as evidence against me. It's a freak show, people. It's a guilty pleasure that I have no business reading and I just. can't. stop!

12. TMZ - online and on tv. I admitted previously that I have a crush on the long-haired surfer dude (His name is Max Hodges, if you were wondering) - and I still include him in my collection of people that I don't really want to have a relationship with, I just want to keep him on a shelf and occasionally take him down and let him entertain me. (Also on that shelf, Anthony Bourdain, Anderson Cooper, Tim Tebow, Vinnie Politan and Bob Beckel, in case you were wondering). TMZ is my daily reminder that as dysfunctional as my life may be at times... there are people who are much, much less functional than me and they're falling apart in front of cameras (ala Brittany Spears in the days before the conservatorship). At least I do it in private. It's my attempt at self-validation. Of course, that's also the reason I watch Toddlers and Tiaras, My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, COPS and several other shows.

13. Blogs. Lots of blogs. I read probably fifty blogs a day (including the twenty times a day I check my own blog to see if I have comments. HA!) I'm voyeuristically involved in the lives of a couple of dozen people that I only know via the internet. I also read a few blogs that counter-act, contradict and in general make fun of other bloggers. Sad but true. There are several story lines that I have followed for years and whose characters feel like real life friends (any of y'all get that here?) and there are several that, just like TMZ, just make me feel better about myself.

So that's the view from The Nest during the lovely season of life. Me, the cats, the tv and the laptop... we're a happy little family! Hope you have a great weekend!