My People

My People
My People - Cosette, Austin, Oliver, Cody, me & Ryan. Just think, had I not lived, these people wouldn't be on the planet. They are my whole heart!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Reasons to Love Monday - digging deep this week

Robin Gibb is dead and I don't feel so good myself.
The washing machine cut off in the middle of a load this morning.
I accidentally washed all my "normal every day clothes" in hot water.
I normally wash everything except for whites in cold water.
I anticipate some fading.
I feel really rotten today, due to the "f word" (fibromyalgia).
There are a couple of nasty components to the "f word" that really bug me: interstitial cystitis and irritable bowel syndrome.
I'm going to make a huge leap and assume you won't need much in the way of explanation on those symptoms.
Both are bugging me today. I've been doubled over all morning.
I'm also itching from head to toe.
Coughing like a life-long smoker (no offense to the life long smokers in my life).
Dragging tail. Feeling miserable. Exhausted. Battling muscle spasms in my back. Running a fever.
I fell asleep crazy early last night, was fairly comatose for about three hours, woke up thinking it was morning and then dozed on and off for the rest of the night.
Got the washing machine started back up and it cut off after about sixty seconds.
Great. Not exactly sure what to do with a load of drenched clothing. I surely can't lift wet laundry out.
I better check the calendar. Apparently it's Wednesday already.
I mean... I could get a really serious cry going if I tried.
I have to take Austin to school around 10:30-11. He's sleeping until then.
I'm tempted to wake him up to ask for his input on the washing machine but... he's really grumpy when he first wakes up and I'm really grumpy when things aren't working right so ... I think this will have to wait.
I would love to just go back to bed today and I might after I take Austin to school.
I have two prospective employers to talk to this week in two very different places.
Austin thinks that he's breaking camp and heading to the married friend's house immediately after graduation.
I have been trying to help him keep things in order: graduate, find a job, get your room packed up, be at the house while mom and mawmaw go to Nashville... you know, logical, responsible order.
Hard sometimes to reconcile his perception of how things should be with the reality of how they actually are.
I understand. I struggle sometimes myself with keeping life in order.
Especially when I have days like today that are really more about surviving than checking anything off my to-do list.
I should have realistically prepared for feeling bad today after having two days of higher than normal activity.
With the end of the school year comes the end of a season of life for me and there will be a definite change in my daily activities.
No matter how you slice, no matter where it is or how much it is, I will be returning to work, at least part time, in the next month.
The respite has helped. I needed a break. It didn't heal me, of course, because the bottom line is that although I can alleviate symptoms from time to time, I will never be "normal" again.
I have a new normal. And some days, like today, it really stinks.
And now... since I've gotten all of that out of my system... it's time for my Reasons to Love Monday!


  • It's Austin's last Monday in public school. Ever.
  • It's May 21st and other than about thirty minutes a week ago, I haven't had to use the a/c yet this year.
  • I got out of the nest a bit over the past weekend and got to see some people who are very dear to me.
  • At church yesterday there were many mentions of "I read your blog" and that really warms my heart!
  • My mom survived another year working in the Clayton County School system without getting shot.
  • I've had a good break. It hasn't always been stress free but it's been good.
  • Somehow, someway, I'm gonna figure out what is wrong with the washing machine. 
  • Austin changed the litter box yesterday. 
  • I don't HAVE to do anything today. 
  • We aren't broke yet and in fact, after two months of nothing, we got a little child support yesterday. (I just have to convince Austin that we need to use that money toward necessities for him, not to buy a new phone).
  • Trouble loves to play with straws and he is busy dragging one through the house now. It's cheap entertainment. You can see the thought bubble over his head wishing he had thumbs.
  • There will be a nap in my schedule today.
  • Life. goes. on. 


Hope you have a great Monday!


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