super saturday. really. it is.

Nothing beats a lazy Saturday...

I slept poorly again... woke up stupid early and decided my best bet was to get the mandatory chores out of the way so I could medicate and hopefully alleviate some of the crazy muscle spasms I'm having.

I made a big grocery run... got lots of fresh produce, Austin's standard junk (hamburgers, poptarts, etc)... fresh fish for me... stuff to make two of my favorite salads: taboule and caprese salad... all the essentials to get us thru the next week.

Thank God child support came on time so I could go to the market today and then do some cooking tomorrow.

I put away the groceries, changed the litter boxes, carried out the trash (all things that I'm not supposed to do)... and I'm feeling it now.

But it's done.

Ultimately... the reality is that there are things I just have to do. And since today is a day that I can completely rest and relax and stay on the electric blanket all day... this was the day to do the heavy lifting.

And the GREAT news is: My appointment with the pain clinic has been moved up to Monday morning! They called yesterday with a cancellation and I was so excited that I squealed. I must have thanked the appointment girl, Jessica, about a dozen times... she was laughing when we hung up the phone.

It's just been such a long, long process. I don't feel like I've gotten good medical care up to this point. I've had to do so much of the legwork myself. I got a call the other day - a survey about my regular doctors office - I was happy to give them feedback. I told them that as long as I'm right in front of the nurse practitioner, I get good care but the followup care is practically non-existent. They don't follow thru on the things they say. They make you feel like a criminal for using the medications they prescribed you. I was glad to have the opportunity to have my say.

One side effect that I'm struggling with - the neurontin that they prescribed - this is the nerve block - when I get up in the morning it's still in my system, it's a long acting medication (on purpose). Because I don't feel pain as acutely with the neurontin, I have little burns all over my fingers from my straightening iron. Normally, I brush up against the straightening iron and pull away... but I don't feel it until it's burned me. That frightens me.

There's got to be a better way.

Did you notice the new picture of BooBoo in his cowboy hat on my sidebar? My friend Amy (from Bruce's office) says, "you sure make purdy kids"... I really do. God blessed us with some good lookin' boys.

I'm excited about March Madness. I love filling out my bracket! Lots of good basketball watching ahead for the next few weeks.

I sent out a bunch of cards over the past few days. I'm excited about those going out and reaching their intended destinations. The dollar store sells cards two for a dollar... so I bought a stack of new cards yesterday.

More than anything, it allows me to be personal and intentional in how I communicate with people. Blogging is a great "mass communication" method and I know there are a lot of people in my life who keep up with me this way... but I like the process of saying to people, "you matter to me". Makes me feel blessed in return, to realize that I have so many people in my life who DO matter to me! I still have about ten stamps so I'm going to have to make a post office run soon... but it's exciting to know that with minimal expense, over the past two weeks I've been able to reach out to about two dozen people!

My heart is still so heavy for the people of Japan. I was praying this morning and thought... I really don't even know how to pray... for those who are trapped... for those who are grieving... for those in continued danger from radiation... for those who are hungry, cold, injured... it's so hard to wrap your mind around that kind of suffering. I can't focus on anything else... I can't focus on any other tv shows other than the news.

Pain is the worst today that it's been... I'm sure because of all the lifting I did this morning... I keep having waves of pain that take my breath away and I'm medicated.

I am trying to keep in perspective that people with chronic pain often become depressed and that's a place I don't want to go... but I can honestly say that I am HAPPIER and more at peace than I've been in a long time, despite the pain. Defies logic, I know... but truly, my spirits are high.

Hope you have a beautiful Saturday! Love and hugs!