Thankful to be who He wants me to be

I should write another post about doing nothing like I did yesterday, because as it turned out... I accomplished a few things and felt much better for it.

I updated my resume. I had been holding off on it... it's like... updating your resume is admitting that you really DON'T have a job. It was much easier because my sweet friend Lisa (I love you, girl!) sent me a link for what looks like a legitimate work from home with sales and customer service type stuff and I had to have a resume to upload to them. Well, praise the good Lord who watches over my disorganized self, I had a copy saved to my home computer and it was easy to update it. Unfortunately, my computer isn't upgraded to the level it needs to be for me to do that particular job but it made me feel good to realize there are legitimate jobs out there that I just might be able to do from home.

I rescued my brother who had run out of gas after taking the kids to school. He might not like me posting that. But it happened and I was so excited to be home and able to help him out. And thankful that it happened after he dropped the girls off and not before. He's had the girls all week by himself because Angie's been at one of those conference things and he does such a good job with them. He was just... busy. And they closed down the gas station across the street from them. Around here you kinda have to plan your gas trips because it's not like there's one on every corner. Anyways... made me feel useful.


I went to the dentist to have my stitches out. Come to find out that I had an infection and a dry socket, which is supposed to be enormously painful but, other than being uncomfortable and just feeling icky, which I thought was fibromyalgia-ish, depression-ish type ick. I'm thankful that I didn't have the pain that would normally have accompanied that situation.I have felt really headachey and drained and unable to focus and I attributed it to the pollen, the fibromyalgia, depression, etc. Never occurred that it was the removal of that cyst from my gum and side effects from that. Once I got through the day past my little procedure and the bleeding stopped and the nausea stopped, I just went on to deal with other things like, you know, getting fired. I suspect it was a combination of things.

Stubby the nurse cat has been trying to stay as close to me as possible. Trouble, who considers me HIS responsibility is having NONE of that. Any time Trouble is in the litter box or eating... Stubby is like, "the coast is clear" and comes running to my rescue. Then Trouble realizes that Stubby is in HIS territory and he chases after him. It's like having sibling rivalry. Crazy cats. I guess I'm the Crazy Cat Lady with the "crazy" describing the cat, not the lady. I hope. I love them so much and I'm grateful to be entertained by them.

I'm letting Austin sleep in this morning and I'm taking him to school. We love Miss Nessa (best bus driver ever!) but he has to get up so early to meet the bus and our house is running on a little later schedule, praise the Lord. I also promised him a Starbucks. He worked so hard yesterday getting the kitchen clean... he took out the litter box, the trash, scrubbed my dirty kitchen floor, cleaned off the counters, emptied the dishwasher and I had only asked him to do one of those things (the litter box). I had this talk with Austin not too long ago that we both share the responsibility for keeping our little apartment looking nice... and now that he's 18, it's even more important. He is such a blessing and a comfort to me.

I'm having fasting blood work this morning so I can't have a treat at Starbucks when we go. My doctor appointment is at 9:30 but I'm gonna head over there earlier in the hopes that they will go ahead and do the blood work so that I can eat something. I don't operate well when fasting.

After the doctor appointment... I'm meeting with unemployment. I'm not expecting to be approved but I still feel like it's important to go. You know, so much of this stuff is just going through the motions. I have decided not to file for disability until I have a decision from unemployment.

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So, again, I'm faced with a situation that seems like "the end of the world"... and it's. just. not. I'm glad for all the things that God has brought me through because I have been conditioned to have expectant hope for the light he's going to shine through the darkness. He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it. I'm one hundred percent certain of this.

This Thursday I am so grateful that I have gone through a whole week with less pain. I'm thankful for what lies ahead... whatever it is.... wherever it is... I'm thankful that I'm no longer in a situation where I feel unappreciated. I am thankful for the rest I've gotten this week. I'm thankful for everything that spurs me on and moves me toward God's will for me.

All I've prayed... for so many years... is "God... let me walk in your will... let me be who YOU want me to be"... I've prayed my heart out in my car... in the kitchen at the office while my tea was heating up... every restroom trip... on lunch break.... I've just covered this whole process in prayer. This makes me confident that nothing that has happened to me was an accident. God has allowed me to go through (is allowing, present tense) what He needed me to go through so that I could be who He destined me to be and to be where He destines me to be. And I. just. can't. WAIT!

Happy Thursday y'all!