crazy.

You can't make this stuff up.
And if you could - you wouldn't want to.
**disclaimer**
I am not sad or depressed. I am just old fashioned frustrated. Eeyore style.
And I am high on benadryl.
Here's the story:

Yesterday I went to the doctor and confirmed what I had suspected - I have a kidney infection.
The medicine wasn't ready when I went by the pharmacy yesterday. I was going to wait (I know, crazy) to pick it up after work today. But... I was really uncomfortable last night... to the point of being woken up from a dead (ambien) sleep. Since we're shorthanded at work (and because I need the money) it was not feasible to take a day off... so I waited for the pharmacy to open, picked up my meds and went in to work about 45 minutes late.

I got to work... took the meds... started working and... about twenty minutes later, I was talking to Theresa and she said, "there is this red dot on your forehead... it looks like a welt"... I went to the bathroom... and noticed that welt... and one starting on my shoulder... and in about ten minutes... I had welts all over my chest and tummy...

I called the doctor. Their first concern was, "are you having trouble breathing?" No. She said, "you need to take benadryl immediately"... um. Ok. Immediate is relative. Because... #1 - I didn't have any with me. #2 - benadryl knocks me out. #3 - I needed to be at work. I asked what would happen if I just rode it out... the nurse said, "you've got to reverse the effects... you need to get benadryl NOW".

So... I made my apologies to the skeleton crew at the office... and drove the twenty minutes from Demorest to Cleveland... itching like crazy... down my legs and arms... with red spreading around my face... very attractive... and went to the Ingles to get benadry. Why Ingles? Because I knew the benadryl would knock me out and we are out of toilet paper. And cat litter. And sugar. Yes, I made an emergency grocery run BEFORE taking the benadryl. And stopped by the pharmacy to see if the replacement meds were in - they aren't. Which means I've got to wait until the benadryl is out of my system before trying to pick them up again. Which takes me back to where I was at 8am this morning.

Good times.

So far the benadryl is NOT working but I'm still hopeful. I am starting to get a little foggy though... so it should start working.

In the 45 minutes I was at work... I had an email from my boss in Jacksonville - Kathy. We have been catching up via email this week. I had to send an email to my uncle's office about a problem on my mom's homeowners application for their new house. I had an email from my old buddy, Dean, about the ongoing drama between him and my husband's other's woman (Dean's ex-wife).

I've been pretty resolute about not allowing Michael's drama to overflow into my life. I throw away the bills that come here. I haven't talked about him much lately. I'm done. Healed. Over it. But just as a single mom who has fought for child support for ten years... and is owed over $30,000 in back child support and whose children's father STOOD UP HIS KID for Thanksgiving this year... I am LIVID at what is going on with Dean right now.

This woman who relieved me of my husband is suing the loving father of her children for $340 of back child support. Now... he LIVES in Louisville, Kentucky and his kids live in Jacksonville, Florida so he has to travel (by air, mostly) back and forth every other weekend to see them. And he does. Court was scheduled for a Monday. He works Saturday, Sunday and Monday. That's it. 13 hour shifts. He made two requests via his attorney to move the court date to any day other than Monday. Both were denied... and then... since he was at work on Monday, working to be able to pay the ridiculous percentage of child support he's required to pay to his adulterous ex-wife... the judge issued a warrant for his arrest for failure to appear or notify the court of the reason for his absense.

I've seen all the court documents. They're public record. She should be ashamed of herself. That judge needs to be brought up on disciplinary action.

And... well, I didn't mention it but... I talked to Michael yesterday. He called to make sure I was ok with the upcoming court proceedings. My answer, "no. I'm not ok with it... my intention was to stay married." But I'm glad it's almost over. Michael asked if I had talked to Dean - and I hadn't at that point. Michael said, "Your buddy is about to end up in jail." I'm not saying it was gloating. But it was gloating. He should be ashamed of himself. Especially as a father who has diligently tried to remain involved in his childrens' lives financially and physically and has himself faced unfair retribution at times. Including being jailed at his grandfather's funeral for kidnapping... he knows...

At times I feel so different... so removed from that situation... that I forget how ridiculous it all is. Dean has to pay over $3000 in the next 20 days between court fees and her attorney fees and back child support. It makes me angry. It breaks my heart for Dean. And it makes me wonder what Michael - as a father who has been through the baby mama drama - sees in a woman who is that vengeful. Maybe that is what he was looking for. Maybe I wasn't mean enough.

We will all face a greater judge one day. And though, without a doubt, there are things that I've done in my past that I'm not proud of... they are in my past. I work every day to be a better human being than I was the day before. I haven't taken my baby daddy to court... because although he owes me quite a bit of money... I have compassion for him. He is a human being. I see him still as the man who was with me on the three most special days of my life - when my children were born. I see him as the man who taught my boys to play ball... and shave... and drive... and although he hasn't been what I would have hoped him to be as a father... I don't think my children would be better off if their father was in jail. Even if he isn't involved in their lives.

Ok. On full on benadryl high now... settled in and chilled out and ready to rest. Love and hugs, y'all!