random wednesday

Random Wednesday. Not whiny Wednesday because I did that yesterday and I’m not going to complain today. Honest.

But I just can’t figure out why the people I work with will leave 3 squares of toilet paper on the roll. If it’s down to three squares… common courtesy would be to replace, don’t you think? Drives me nuts. I potty a lot so I’m frequently changing tp. Not that it’s a hard job or anything. Just frustrating to have to deal with bathroom etiquette that I wouldn’t permit my children to have. There’s been an ongoing problem with lack of cooperation in all areas of supplies, though, and it’s been addressed recently. I’m complaining here because if I complained in real life it might not be with enough tact.

My skin is so bad right now that I need a skintervention. My pores are so big you could drive a truck through them. I need a gay man in my life, bad. I miss spa nights with Ethan and Joey… they would color my hair… we’d do facials…give each other massages… have a carpet picnic and watch chick flicks. Drop Dead Gorgeous and Steel Magnolias were two of our favorites.

It’s cold here this morning. That’s not a complaint, just an acknowledgement.

Fortunately, I didn’t have to do the hair routine this morning… it was still straight from yesterday, despite the frizzy weather we had. It makes me sick to think about coming up with the cash for another good straightening iron when the cat needs shots, I need to pay for Austin’s tux for the wedding and I need to also purchase wedding gifts. Argh. Yet… I’m fortunate to have cute hair that needs maintenance… a cuddly kitten that needs maintenance… and gorgeous boys to dress up and give gifts to. I know that it’s far better to be broke with a happy lot of people in my life than be rich and lonely. At least I think it’s better. I’ve not had much experience with the other. Well, other than Jacksonville. Although we were never as financially stable as I was led to believe.

Fortunately, my car started right away this morning. I never take it for granted.

I’m way more congested today. That’s not a complaint. Really. I’ve spent less than $100 on health care this year… a bottle of Nyquil, some cough drops, some advil… by this time last year the number was closer to $2000. I think I’m managing my healthcare costs better, even if I’m not one hundred percent healthy. My reality is that I will deal with chest congestion from time to time. As long as I’m able to still function… work… keep a home… and have some semblance of a normal life, I can live with it. It’s easier since we did all that extensive testing last year and I know why I feel like I feel.

My birthday is tomorrow! Woohoo! It’s not a milestone birthday but in several ways it’s a milestone for me. It’s the first year of my life since puberty that I haven’t had some sort of romantic entanglement for a WHOLE YEAR. I have derived NONE of my self-esteem, none of my income, nothing at all from a significant or insignificant other. Sisters are doing it for themselves, y’all! Just me, Auggie, the kitties and the people who pray for me and stand in the gap for me out of pure, unconditional love for me, not because they HAVE to.

Yes, there are moments that it’s hard… like yesterday morning when the car wouldn’t start and I had to make a decision about whether or not to turn it over to a mechanic or to try to use my own resources to get it working. I prayed. It was a decision I was not equipped to make on my own. I needed counsel from someone who knew more than me about the situation. And in those moments it’s hard to not have a guy to bounce things off… but honestly… I got a swift, decisive result from my brother. The car troubles I had while I was with Michael fell completely on me to resolve. He was zero help. Not even with the damages he caused. I can remember how frustrating it was for me as a young married mother of three who had virtually no assistance from my kids’ dad, even though we were together. I watched the single moms in my church get help from our church family and I thought, “I’m more overwhelmed than they are…”

The moral of the story is that it’s better to have no man in your life at all than to have a dysfunctional, irresponsible, selfish one. The second moral of the story is that God provides everything you need, exactly when you need it. I may not have all my wants. I may have times that I have to stress over how to manage my financial obligations. But God does provide.

Always.

I just remembered that I have to get my car tag. Yikes.

Oh well. Happy Birthday to my cousin Christie today! She’s …. 29.

Hope y’all all have a wonderful Wednesday. Quit yer whinin’!