a few questions

As I mentioned yesterday... my adorable niece, Sarabeth Leah Gant is six years old today! Sarabeth has the distinction of being the first girl born into our family after me... Tiffany and Elizabeth are treasured members of our family but they came to us when their mommies married one of my brothers. After I was born there was a gap of 34 years before another Gant Girl was born. That makes Sarabeth my legacy. I loved her before she was even born. From birth, I could hold her for a few minutes and all the stress in the world would melt away. She still has that power. She has a few traits that aren't like Aunt Heather... she's more of an introvert, a bit quiet and reflective, almost shy at times. But she loves lip gloss and nail polish and is a dainty, girly girl just like me. A few SB pictures....


last summer, taking a bath at Aunt Heather's condo








Posing with Cousin Cody... they switched hats and she thought that was really funny!


In St. Augustine last Summer. She is standing on the seawall... she's tall, but not taller than me. Yet.
















At Castillo de San Marcos in St. Augustine. Sarabeth wanted to talk to the soldier guy to find out what they ate for lunch at the fort back in the day. She was so focused on being able to talk to him... and finally did. This picture was of her striding back from that encounter. I love how tall and confident she is!















Today I have to do what I was supposed to do yesterday and didn't do - complete the transfer of my corporate data from Florida to this office. Yesterday I was supposed to do it at 10:30 and the DISH guy was coming at 12. I was afraid I wouldn't finish and wouldn't be back in time. They couldn't begin the DISH installation without an adult there. I knew if I missed our appointment it would be several days before they could come back... and by that time I would have started work so it would mean missing work.

And... I was a little weepy yesterday morning and knew I wasn't in the right frame of mind to be in my new office. I don't want to go in there as a drama queen. I want my first impression to be that I am a woman of faith, confidence, strength... I don't want to pretend to be something I'm not... but in my heart, I am not that sad and weepy person and I don't want people to feel sorry for me there. Yes, I have faced obstacles and yes, I am dealing with some deep hurts and huge disappointments. But I am a survivor. Sometimes the "goin' through" is a little hard to bear... and in those moments I cry... or cry out... and literally have to pray my way through it. I am afraid to go back to work. I am afraid of the routine and the responsibility and afraid that I will not have the energy or the strength to handle working full time. I guess the truth is I don't... and I will have to rely on God for the strength to get through the work day and not just survive but also thrive. I have a lot to prove. I need this job.

Alright... I've got about 50 followers and I am so thrilled by that! On AOL you never really knew how many people were reading and it's exciting to know that many of you want to hear my story. I know there are many more who read and who comment back to me by email or text or myspace or facebook and that's awesome. I don't mind how you talk to me, just talk to me. You are a huge part of my recovery! Your positive input... your reality checks.... your willingness to be honest with me and share from your heart... makes such a huge difference in my life.

So now I want to have audience participation from my readers... you don't have to answer ALL of these questions but if you'll answer a couple and give me a little insight to who you are... and maybe give me a little encouragement as well.

1. I have several bible verses that I have committed to memory that give me strength when I am discouraged. Can you share a few of your favorite? Or maybe just a quote or passage or song lyric that you find empowering?

2. What would you consider your "lean" years as far as finances are concerned? Many might say college - or when they were newly married. Tell me about your hard times and how you survived... ramen noodles? I may glean some tips that help us get through!

3. I'm interested in your love stories. It's discouraging to not be "lucky in love". My first marriage was abyssmal. My second marriage was, without a doubt, the greatest disappointment I've ever faced. I want to hear stories about how you may have given up on finding someone special and ended up meeting him...

4. I'm loving having TV again after 3 weeks of not really watching. I'm a big tv junkie. My favorite show right now is Jon & Kate Plus 8... what show are you watching obsessively and why?

5. I'm also a big magazine reader. I love People, Shape, Self, Weight Watchers, Family Circle, Good Housekeeping... lots and lots of random mags. What magazine do you never miss? Why?

That's it for now... you can blog your answers in your own blog and leave a link in comments so everyone can follow you... you can email me... send me a myspace or facebook message... whatever. I look forward to hearing from lots of old blog friends and meeting new blog friends too! I really want to strengthen my community here... as well as building my real life community. Thanks for reading, thanks for indulging me.

Have a great Tuesday!
Happy Birthday Max!