thankful for the bigger picture

"I once ate at this garden place....mmmm... letmethinkaminute... yes, it was called the OLIVE Garden"... Emily, age 7 (I think, maybe 6)

"Jamie. JAMIE. JAAAAYMEEEEEEE!!!! Come over here. Don't forget to hug Aunt Heather before she goes to class". My sweet Sarabeth, age 8.

I love my little girls. Wednesday nights are all about girls... the little girls that sit with me at dinner and give me hugs in exchange for the little surprises I bring them... the big girls in my Hen Party class. I've grown up around so much BOY stuff... my girl nights are a treat.

I think Wednesday nights help prepare me for Thankful Thursdays.

For Sarabeth's birthday I gave her a trip to the mall... which we haven't taken yet as there hasn't been time...yet. She wanted to go THAT DAY or THE NEXT DAY. She loves the mall... and it's one of the most fun things we've done together this year... merry go round, Starbucks, shopping, riding the escalators (my little country girls love the escalators). I think I'm as excited about it as she is. We'll shop for an outfit or toy or whatever she wants (within Aunt Heather's budget). Good times.

Last night's dinner was a bbq pork sandwich on white bread. *grimace* It was really good but I'm feeling the pork today. My weight is still slightly up... and maybe it's the advil I've been taking over the past week to keep the headaches under control... I'm not going to panic but I am going to find time to walk today and tomorrow. FOR SURE.

Friday night I'm having dinner with Joshy - my boys best friend - and his wife Megan. There are a couple of good options near my office, they're meeting me there. I usually try to eat light the night before weigh in but I'm not going to be obsessive. This is about living a lifestyle that I can maintain for the rest of my life. People occasionally eat out. And... considering that throughout this WHOLE process there's only been one time I had a gain - of point two pounds... and one time I stayed the same... I think I've done far better than the average bear with this program.

Despite not getting the exercise piece of the puzzle into play. Yet. I will. Honest.

Yesterday was one of those "I didn't see that coming" days... I spent a big part of the day feeling like Alice down the rabbit hole. Odd things happening all around me. However... I just so believe in the "bigger picture" that God is orchestrating in my life that I just sigh and move on.

One of the odd things... Austin called asking me to bring him a clean shirt. He put his head down during his first class and realized there was cat pee on his shirt. It was very distressing for him... it would be for anyone but he has such a strong sensitivity to smells that once he realized it was there it took his entire focus. I knew it was going to lead to a meltdown, one way or another but... there was truly NO WAY I could leave the office right at that moment due to some other odd things that were happening. I called Jim. No answer. I knew Angie wouldn't really have access to a shirt for him. It was too early for Stasha to be up... so I called Natalie (Jorjanne's mama). Natalie runs an off campus program for kids at the high school to have bible teaching during the school day - they just have to be bussed away from the school. I thought she was my best bet to be heading toward the school. She wasn't... but the bus driver WAS... so she found a shirt for Austin and sent it with the bus driver (who also goes to our church... and whose wife was one of my first bosses back at the time that Austin was born... who I was on the phone with when Austin called because they just bought a new car and we have their car insurance... get the picture? It's a very small world up here!) I was highly amused that it came together in that way... and grateful that I have a happy little village here that I can count on in a pinch.

I also got to talk to Barry yesterday. I had a dream the other night... you know how I am about my dreams... I believe that God reveals things to us in our dreams (and there is a lot of scripture to back that theory up) and I believe the bible shows that there is symbolism in dreams. My dream was very vivid... Barry had a new baby. The woman who actually gave birth was older... definitely at the age where it didn't seem likely she would be able to give birth. I called him the next day and said... "Hey... I had a dream about you, just want to make sure everything is ok". Not because I thought he was really about to literally become a parent but because a new baby in dreams usually signifies a life change - new stage of life - that sort of thing. He finally called me back yesterday and I shared this with him. Well. As it turns out... his mother had tried to get conservatorship over his father (they have been separated for years) and the court decided that Barry was the better candidate as he was younger and has lived with his father for several years. His dad is 93... his mom is younger but disabled so it would have probably been difficult for her to handle. So that's your new baby from an older woman. Dad is in the early stages of Alzheimers so he's no longer able to handle his own affairs and he has some rental properties and assets that require management.

Barry's dad has always fascinated me... old people always do because they're living, breathing history lessons... but can you imagine what a black man born in 1917 would have witnessed in his lifetime? Most likely he was only two generations removed from slavery in the deep south. I wonder what stories he could tell... and what stories his parents and grandparents may have shared with him. Even Barry faced hard core racism... the restaurant that fed his high school football team their pregame meal every week did not allow black people - yes, even in the 80's - but they made an EXCEPTION for Barry when he was with his team. He's not activist about it... it only came up when I asked him to meet me for breakfast at that restaurant. I knew that - even though the area around the restaurant is now predominately African-American, you almost never see a black person there. That's why. I don't understand it... I will never understand that kind of hate for people just based on their skin color.

But that's a whole other post, now isn't it?

Thankful Thursday... hmmm... I'm thankful for a lot of things... but today, I'm most grateful that there is a bigger plan in place than anything I could put together in my own finite wisdom and understanding. I'm thankful for little girls and old men and all the life that happens in between. I'm thankful for the twists and turns that life takes and the lessons we learn on those little detours. I'm thankful for ages and stages of life. New adventures. Every new morning. Every new opportunity. Just happy to be here, y'all.