My People

My People
My People - Cosette, Austin, Oliver, Cody, me & Ryan. Just think, had I not lived, these people wouldn't be on the planet. They are my whole heart!

Friday, November 21, 2008

from the "you can't make this stuff up" files

Last night I battled anxiety - and won, thank you very much! But it's the big bad monster just outside my door and I have to work hard to guard my heart and mind against fear - lies that are told to me and about me - frustration - desperation - sadness - anger - I have to battle all these demons and I'll be honest with you, it's exhausting. It's also exhilarating when I have minor victories. Every day is a victory.

This morning while I was straightening up my room I found a xanax on the floor. Don't ask me how it got there. I haven't had xanax in my possession since the night before I left Jacksonville. I gave the whole bottle to my brother with the agreement that if I needed them, I would ask him for it and we would decide together if I needed them. So far I haven't asked for one.

I did take some flexeril for my back last night and it didn't help at all, which tells me that this is not a muscle pull. I'm heading out the door for the doctor now.

It's Friday! In approximately ten hours I'll be heading back home to start my weekend!


I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

It is cold and windy with snow pouring down here this morning. I like your thought at the end of the post...about heading home for the weekend. I will be very glad when that time of day comes for sure. 'On Ya'-ma

Myra said...

Kudos to you for celebrating the victories your recognize, and those you don't! Have a wonderful day!

Estela said...

It's almost the weekend! Kudos on your continued victories. I know it's hard, but the face you put on here tells me you are up to the task. Go Heather! :)

Emmi said...

Glad to hear you were able to beat the moster back. Congrats on standing strong.

Lainey Laine said...

Awwwww hun enjoy your weekend.xxxx
Laine xxx

Tina said...

I am playing catch up here. sounds like you have had quiet a week. glad you got rid of that migraine and i hope you have a great week.

Beth said...

I hope you were able to find out what's going on with your back. It seems like there are a lot of people on here who are having back problems lately.

Hugs, Beth